Lately I dont know how to feel.
But that’s just it. My emotions, how I feel,
Has complete control of the steering wheel.
I’m swerving left and right, don’t know where I’m going,
I’m digging deep, trying to find a map
But I just can’t find where I’m at.
Trying to remember what someone said,
or was there a landmark in the book I read,
the ideas and possibilities cloud my head
I’m confused and lost,
but I sure won’t admit it
I’ve got so much invested, I just have to finish
Fear and Pride meet,
what a deadly combination
they do a great job of adding to the situation
I’m so afraid inside
I know I somehow won’t make it
But outside I just have to fake it
I just keep driving here and there
pretending that I don’t care
I can feel the people stare
but look up, I don’t dare.
If I let them know I’m scared
or that my vision’s impaired….
They will give up on me
They will have no more hope
I will have failed, reached the end of my rope
With that, I don’t think I can cope.
I don’t understand where this comes from
or how to make it leave
because it doesn’t always work to “Just Believe”
I will be driving away into the dark
Set on finding something all by myself
Even though I really need help.
I don’t know how long this stubbornness will last
Or if I’ll ever learn to take off this mask…
