God does not call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
This phrase keeps repeating itself over and over in my mind. After I got accepted to participate in this trip I kept repeating this phrase like it was my mantra. Throughout the process I have been asked so many questions about this trip, and, sadly, the majority of those questions I feel I leave unanswered. These should be fairly simple questions to answer, like “will you have internet connection?” or “how can I get a hold of you?” or “what happens in an emergency?” Yet, the answer “I don’t know” seems to suffice for the moment. Sometimes I feel like I should know more. Sometimes I feel like I should do more research or be more prepared than I am. I feel as if I am worrying over not being worried. But, why should I? One main goal of mine on this trip is to get closer to God in a way that I have yet to experience. By trusting in Him to guide me and carry me, am I not finally taking one more step closer to Him? For quite some time I have struggled with the idea that I must be independent. In some ways, it has been extremely beneficial for me by instilling confidence in myself and my abilities. On the other hand though, it has made me struggle in my relationship with the Lord. I know I am dependent on God, as I should be. The problem, however, is in the word itself. “Depend” is a word that scares me. Silly thing is, I know it shouldn’t (especially as an English major). Instead of feeling unsure about my supposed lack of information regarding the details of the trip, for once I feel calm and collected. I know I am in God’s hands; He is holding me and guiding me. I’m not worried simply because I know this. God is watching out for me and will continue to protect me, so why should I feel worried or concerned? I am doing what I can with God’s help, and I cannot wait to meet people who will further encourage and strengthen my faith in Him as I hope to do in others.
