September is 5 months away. I will be leaving for 11 months. I don't know if that has hit me quite yet. September is not negotiable. God's plans are set. He has already decided and he doesn't really change his mind. The costs of this trip are mounting. The financial aspect is clear, but what else is there to think about- to count? I have to make up my mind to follow Jesus, even after calculating the cost. And sometimes that might take a little push from God to press the numbers into the "calculator".
The funny thing is it takes me about 3 times to hear God's words, if not more. I think it takes me so long because of my stubbornness. I don't see God's true words the first time, so he uses the next time to speak to me. At this point still nothing has broken down inside of me to see the heart of God, so he goes to the third time. Well, I feel like the journey to leave in September is just that. I have felt like the Lord has been calling me to give up my life for him. Of course encountering a few stubborn moments along the way, but i have tried to. In my own way, of course hasn't been enough-who would have known ;). I am still calculating the costs of the trip though. He has called me to give up my life for him. Is that the only cost? No.
September. Not just the departure month of my 11 month journey, but the birth month of my first neice/nephew.
October. Not just the second month away on my journey, but the potential month of my brothers graduation from air force basic training camp.
November. Not just the first signaficant holiday month along the trip, but the wedding anniversary month of my parents.
December. Not just the fourth month into my world race, but the graduation month of my best friends from college.
April. Not just a new country on the route, but the 2 year anniversary of my parents coffee shop.
May. Not just the latter end of my life changing experience, but the one year wedding anniversary of my sister and brothe-in-law.
The cost of following Jesus adds up.
In Luke 9, the Cost of Following Jesus is written, "'As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, 'I will follow you wherever you go.' Jesus replied, 'Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.' He said to another man, 'Follow me.' But he replied, 'Lord, first let me go and bury my father.' Jesus said to him, 'Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.' Still another said, 'I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.' Jesus replied, 'No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.'"
Am i like those who say I want to follow Jesus, but have to look back to say goodbye to my family? These were life moments I had to weigh in on when I made my decision. Even though I will "miss out" on those times in my family and friends lives, I have first and foremost decided to follow Jesus. The Bible tells of more people in my shoes when it comes to leaving family.
In Mark 10, the story of the rich young ruler, "As Jesus started on his way, a man ran up to him and fell on his knees before him. 'Good teacher,' he asked, 'what must I do to inherit eternal life?' 'Why do you call me good?' Jesus answered. 'No one is good—except God alone. You know the commandments: ‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, you shall not defraud, honor your father and mother.’ 'Teacher,' he declared, 'all these I have kept since I was a boy.' Jesus looked at him and loved him. 'One thing you lack,' he said. 'Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.' At this the man’s face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth. Jesus looked around and said to his disciples, 'How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God!' The disciples were amazed at his words. But Jesus said again,'Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.' The disciples were even more amazed, and said to each other, 'Who then can be saved?' Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.' Then Peter spoke up, “We have left everything to follow you!”"Truly I tell you,"Jesus replied, “no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age: homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—along with persecutions—and in the age to come eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”
After weighing the costs, I have confidently, honestly, and full-heartedly decided to leave my family, friends, and life in America to unashamably follow the Lord of Heaven and Earth into this 11 month journey! The sacrifice will be unknown, but the reward is unwavering!
