Time Out

Ever since we got to Phnom Penh we have been go.go.go, constantly doing something. When we first got here I started out great I was
reading the Bible in the mornings and enjoying my time with Him. It was easy, our bodies hadn’t quite
adjusted to the time change, we woke up hours before we had to go to
ministry, so I was able to take my time and not be rushed and enjoy time
with the Lord. However, we eventually started to get
used to the time difference and we adjusted. Our long days and time in
the sun started weighing on me. I
found myself sleeping in longer and rushing my time with the Lord, and
while in Siem Reap I just didn’t spend time with Him at all.

So here I am, sick in bed, wishing I could be at ministry. I came to Cambodia to love on these girls and when we finally get a chance to I have a fever. At first I thought this was spiritual warfare, Satan obviously doesn’t want them to know that they are loved and definitely doesn’t want them to know Christ’s love for them. So it seemed to me that Satan had decided to attack to keep me from these girls. Even though I had a slight fever I still wanted to go to the house and play games and do crafts with the girls. However, I learned that if I really loved these girls I would stay at the guest house and get better.  What kinda of love would that be to go and be coughing and sneezing the whole time, being miserable myself and risk getting them sick as well. I learned that I can’t love anyone well, if I am not loving and taking care of myself.

 

God has used this to teach me about His sovereignty and man’s responsibility. He is sovereign; He could have prevented my sickness, but I am also to be held responsible. I was not taking care of myself at all, not drinking enough water and not nourishing myself with His word. 

 

The best part of being sick is I have all this alone time to spend Jesus! It’s hard
when you are living in community and around the same people to ever
have alone time. Don’t get me wrong, I love the girls on my team, but the
introvert in me sometimes just needs time alone. Satan wanted to
discourage me and make me sick, but the Lord is using this to draw me
closer to Him.