“Daughter don’t be afraid, I got you” “Let me lead you my beloved”
One thing God has been whispering in my ear since training camp and through out China is to be vulnerable and not be afraid to be led.
When I hear these whispers I respond with, “Lord how?” I ask myself, “Why can’t you be vulnerable?” “What is wrong with me?” For the longest time I thought the reason I had trouble being led by God is because in the past, earthly leaders I have looked up too failed in leading.
God spoke to me again, but this time He showed me through a visual and it happened on the steps of the Great Wall.
Before we started climbing the steps of the great wall we were given the option to either ride the cable car, which cost extra money, or walk up stairs, which would take about 45 minutes to get to the top. I chose the cheaper, but harder way. In the beginning of our climb I was energetic and happy about the choice I made, but after 20 minutes of climbing, I began to get restless and doubt if my decision to walk was going to be worth it.
While I was regretting my decision of choosing to walk, God showed me a visual of the difference of choosing the cable car or walking to get to the top of the wall. The cable car is like a follower that chooses in the beginning to take the easier way, by putting all their trust in Him. This way, they know they are safe and carried by God all the way to the top, at God’s pace. Though this way may be easier physically and emotionally, the follower is being completely vulnerable because they’re depending on God alone to be led to the top. Walking is compared to a follower who chooses the harder way physically and emotionally. Since this way the follower is not being carried it can become difficult physically causing the follower to choose when they want to be led or when they want to stop and walk at their own pace. The walker at times may begin to depend on his or her own strength as well and not realize it. Emotionally, the walker isn’t as vulnerable because they can choose to back out when times get hard.
After receiving this visual, I realized what God was trying to tell me all a long. Which is, I have been blinded to the fact that I don’t know how to follow and be carried. I have never fully learned what it looks like to be led. I have been choosing the harder way, the way I know I still have a little control, the way I am not fully vulnerable emotionally, and can turn back down the wall when times get hard.
All He is asking of me is to TRUST in HIM, to not compare my past leadership experiences to the way He desires to lead me. He wants to carry me in the palm of His hand and allow me to walk in his strength. My Father gives me the option daily to be led by him and today I’m gonna walk in it! “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
“Show me your ways LORD, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long” (Psalm 25:4-5)
Prayer: Lord thank you for your unfailing love and patience. I pray as my team and I continue on this journey that you would give us the wisdom to follow your guidance wholeheartedly, faithfully leaving our fear and own will behind. Father, let me be who I am supposed to be today through your leadership. Teach me your ways Lord and fill my heart with a burning passion to be led. Guide my team where you are moving daily, and live through us what you want to see happen today!
