Something you have to understand about my relationship with my mom is that she is WAY more than just my mom. I moved back in with my parents about a year ago, and I work in the same building my mom works in. She's my mom, but she's also one of my closest friends, my co-worker, and my roommate. You could say we're close, but it would be closer to the truth to say that we're practically the same person. Learning that my mom has cancer was NOT okay with me.
Surgery was scheduled for the 15th, but my brother was home on leave from the Navy – he just happened to get home the night before my mom found out she has cancer – and we really thought it would be better to be able to take out the tumor while he could be here…so my mom’s surgeon/oncologist (they are the same person, what a blessing) rearranged his schedule (and, we think, his vacation plans) to take the tumor out earlier.
August 2, 2011. My whole family: mom, dad, little brother (minus his US Navy uniform), older sister (minus her husband and two children) climbed into mom’s car. My siblings and I all shared the back seat like we had done countless times before – but this time we weren’t going to Florida to see Mickey Mouse, or South Carolina to spend a week at the beach. We weren’t going to Tennessee to see family, or to the movies. We were going to the hospital to begin the hardest, and most unifying fight of our lives.
Mom’s surgery was scheduled for 11am, but started closer to 11:40. Before 3pm, her surgeon came out to tell the hoard of people (seriously, we owned the waiting room) waiting to hear good news how the surgery had gone. “I was able to remove the entire tumor in one piece, and I inspected the lymph node chain and removed 12 that I believe may be affected.”
He just said this cancer may be in 12 of my mom’s lymph nodes? No way. It’s not in her lymph nodes. I started telling people then that it wasn’t in them, and I kept telling them that. I’d say, “you’re all going to be shocked when pathology comes back and there is no cancer in her lymph nodes.”
She came out of surgery, and the next few days in the hospital were ROUGH. We never did quite figure out how to manage her pain well while we were there… but I had the blessing and privilege of learning that a WR Alum/staff member had also experienced her mom being diagnosed with cancer a few weeks before her launch…not only had she been where I am, but because Y squad was launching out of DC, I could SEE her, and PRAY WITH her, and hear her story a little bit. I met with her in Old Town Alexandria for a glass of wine and an ice cream cone, good conversation, and a powerful prayer sesh outside a parking garage (thank you, WR staff+Alumni).
After meeting with her, I got to spend the night in the hospital with my mom…A night one-on-one with my mom/friend/co-worker/roommate.
Stay tuned for the finale (Part 3)…
