Usually I have lots of photos to post, but not this time. In one absent minded moment, I left my backpack on a tuk tuk in Phnom Penh and lost my laptop along with five months of photos. It’s been a really difficult loss.
At training camp there’s so much talk about being wrecked that it becomes an abstract concept. I understood the idea, but I didn’t expect anything like this. Being wrecked hurts. It’s like that southpaw punch you don’t see coming, and then you wake up face flat on the floor with dried blood on your nose and a few teeth lying in front of you. It could have been the knockout blow. I didn’t feel like getting up or starting all over.
It took a while to accept the loss and I’ve been processing everything for the past week. Jesus has been talking to me nonstop. I think I was clinging to my photos too tightly. I put too much weight on their importance. God doesn’t need my photos. He just wants me to listen to His direction.
He has my attention now. I stopped taking pictures, waiting for his approval to start again. While in Kuala Lumpur, I found some camera equipment I had been trying to find for months. The salesperson attached a lens cover and lens hood to my camera and I looked down and saw the word, “Glory” written on the lens cover. It’s funny how God talks to me. Every time I look at my camera, I’m now reminded that my talent is for His glory and not my own.
While exploring Kuala Lumpur, I stumbled on this incredible photo exhibit in the middle of Chinatown. The photos were amazing and I felt God nudging me and telling me that through His guidance I would begin to see the world through His lens. I knew it was time to start taking photos again.
So, I’ve started from scratch. It’s not easy, but I’m confident that He’s going to restore everything I’ve lost tenfold. It’s hard not to be excited about the future. He’s got big plans for me, but I have to remember to listen.
He’s been so merciful to me in this loss. Malaysia has pretty much everything I could ever need. I’ve managed to replace most everything except my laptop and ipod, but I’m confident that He’ll provide these items before I leave Malaysia and move on to Africa. Jesus is pretty bomb like that.
Ephesians 3:20
Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us.
