For the first time in two years I’m uncomfortable once again being around the commercial sex industry… That is why I love this city.
Month four debriefs location is right smack dab in the center of the sex trade/industry here in Pattaya, Thailand. An entire city literally dedicated to the selling of sex. Women, men, ladyboys, young girls and boys… You name it – it’s here.
Without even venturing down to walking street I’m uncomfortable. I walk down the beach and there are men of all ages with women… Girls… Lady boys… Young boys … There’s no hiding what’s going on here, it’s all out in the open, there’s no shame. I go to get food and every restaurant I’ve been in over the past five days there has also been young Asian women with old white men clearly together. Breakfast, lunch and dinner, and it’s smacks me in the face and in the heart each time.
Our squad spent New Years on the beach volley ball quart, jumping in the ocean at midnight, setting off lanterns and goofing off together. I looked out over the coast line to hundreds of lanterns reflecting off the water and multiple fireworks being set off every second. It was beautiful. I stood there with my squad looking towards the new year with hope for all that God has and with a sense of a new beginning …. That’s a privilege – thousands in this city will spend New Years with hope once again slipping through their fingers. Dreams of a new beginning crushed as they find their night progressing same as the many before… Being bought, giving up a part of themselves at a cost.
(Not my Photo)
My heart just tore inside myself throughout our own celebration… This city stares me down, the demonic here stares me down and in the strength of The King I want to weep. I want to cry out for this city … For these men and women that CRAVE their Dads Love but have no words for it.
I’m uncomfortable as I walk these streets because I’m constantly reminded of the enemies influence and hold here. I’m uncomfortable because the longing for identity is so strong here. I sense and feel the darkness, weight and longing … But even stronger I feel and know the Fathers heartbeat.
It’s impossible to pretend it doesn’t exist here or turn a blind eye. I go throughout my day having to acknowledge the sexual deviance that has it’s teeth in this city. It’s an entire population of girls who have never been fought for … They’ve been placed in a culture that teaches them to be a tease and readily available for men. There is also the population of men here that haven’t been affirmed in their adequacy, in their longing to lead well. Instead they’ve been taught to settle and crave the quick fixes that for a moment tell them they are masculine, to settle for the things that don’t challenge them into higher character. This city hurts my heart.
There is an emptiness here, an atmosphere of trying to satisfy and fill, an acceptance and participation level that makes me squirm. My goal was to prayer walk “walking street” while we were here these few days but unfortunately I never had the chance to. I got the see the entrance/beginning of the street but never walked it. It drives me nuts in my spirit but also gives me the drive to come back one day to release Kingdom here. To call this city up into it’s God breathed purpose. I had no idea that my heart would break in such a way for Pattaya. I’m lucky to have been in the city, and I’m stoked for the day I’ll come back and see more of what the King is doing in this place and get to join Him.
