I am beginning to discover just what the people of Israel must have felt like. Not so much the whole wandering in the wilderness for forty years waiting to get to the promised land, but more in the sense of being sojourners in countries not our own. One of my squad leaders recently commented that each month our lives more and more resemble those of homeless people. We carry around everything we own in backpacks, we sleep on any and every surface imaginable including bus station floors and patches of grass. We get excited when restaurants give us extra napkins or packets of salt, we take extra packets for ourselves, we wear the same clothes for days on end, we don’t match, we smell, we make longing comments under our breath when someone with something nice walk by, etc. We have become vulture like when food is concerned… especially if it is food that we don’t get that often. We walk a lot of the places we need to get to. Etc.
The awesome thing is that it is actually a PRIVILEDGE to be homeless for the Kingdom!! Let’s be honest. I used to have a very high sense of entitlement. I grew up in a very yuppy neighborhood in Colorado, went to high school where there was an ATM in the student entrance, and have lived a very blessed life. In the beginning, although I knew this was a year of abandonment, I still had a very high sense of entitlement. I felt like I deserved things. Like I was important.
After living on the field for 7 months, I have discovered that I by no means “need” all of the things that I used to consider essential to my daily life. All I need is a place to stick my sleeping mat, a hot meal every now and then, a “shower” (be it cold bucket shower, or shower outside), and I know that this is a little crazy but… clean underwear is great too. All in all living for Jesus and knowing that He provides for our every need, I really don’t have much to complain about on this journey called life. I have been called to live out Isaiah 61 and I have been able to minister to so many people who need hope.
Although there are certain things that I miss and appreciate back in the States (a hot shower is first on my agenda once I get home), there is nothing I would trade for this experience. I wouldn’t change anything about the way a child smiles at me when I play games with them. I love the smiles we get on the street from women selling fruits and vegetables. I wouldn’t exchange God moments and ministry opportunities. I wouldn’t go back to believing the lie that I didn’t have anything important to say, because the reality is that the Holy Spirit is in me and He has made my words powerful and effective. I wouldn’t change a thing because every minute, every day my team is bringing the Kingdom of God to the lost and hurting generations.
We get back in the States on November 19, and while I don’t know much more about what I’ll be doing back in the States once the Race is done, I no longer mind being homeless for the sake of the Gospel. The Lord blesses and so we can bless in return.
