They will never know who I use to be. They will never see the strength I loss. When they look at me they see only a shell. These are the thoughts I have when I meet someone new. I do not want them to define me by my weakness. I use to lift over 250 like it was nothing. Now I cannot open a plastic bottle. How does that make sense?
People ask how I doing and I tell them I have good and bad days. What I do not say is even the good days equal soreness and pain just more or less, I wake up each day wondering what part me will be harder to move today. One hand feeling better while the other feels worse.
The constant pain has taught me something. It has taught me I am more than my hands. I am more than once being one of the fastest people I know. I am more than the nickname swoll. Far more than what my eyes see in the mirror or feel in the morning.
I have beginning to see me just being a lover of His presence is enough. I am an usher of His presence. If that is what people see in me amen! They will never know who I was, but they will know Him!!!
