When I was a little boy my mom use to always get on to me because when I walked I had a tendency to walk with my head down. She use to say "Joshua get your head up, when you walk like that you look like you are depressed. Walk confidently with your head up." I tried so hard to listen. Admittedly it was hard. It is hard to walk confidently when you are not. Over the last two years, and especially since I have started with the World Race my self-worth has really gone up. Of course I am still in process when it comes to that. I still deal with worrying what others think of how I do things or how say things. God is constantly working on me with that. And yesterday I finally got a revelation that stuck.
This week I am at a thing called the Debrief. It is a time to relax and recuperate from our first two months. It is also a time to speak with leadership about how our time has been over the two months. You get to talk about how you have grown and what the Father is trying to show you in your life. This month if you have read my blogs you know the Father has been showing me I am a warrior. Well yesterday I learned something new about what that means. As I was talking about my first two months I was talking confidently I felt but at the same time I was looking at the ground and not directly at anyone the entire time as I talked. As I finished one of my squadleaders Megan Rouse told me what the father put on her heart. She told me I was like the Karate Kid. If you have seen the movie in the beginning he was not a very confident kid. By the end of the movie he exuded confidence from all the things he had learned. She told me that was me. It was time for me to sit up straight and stand boldly. No longer was I to stare at the ground like I fear what people would think about what I said if I looked them in the eye. That was another big thing was looking others in the eye. She told me you are a warrior and the father did not make you timid he made you powerful and it was time to act like it. She told me that I had so much to offer but I needed to first step into my boldness and power that my Father gave me as a son. And it was all confirmed by everyone else on the leadership team. One squadleader Robbie Riggs said God had basically put the same word on his heart. It hit home so hard. It is something I felt but could not really put into words for myself.
In that moment I realized it was all true. It was finally time to listen to what my mother was trying to tell me so long ago. Sorry moma. I am a warrior and my father has made me strong. I need not fear what others think. My father has put things on my heart to speak and they will bear fruit. So I need not worry. Why shouldn't I stand boldly? My entire life circumstances could have seemed like the cards were stacked against me but my Father always made a way for me. So I declare to all who know me and yet to know me no longer will I not look you in the eye. No longer will I look at the ground. I want you to see the passion in my eyes the father gave me. I sit and I stand with my back held straight!!! I am a WARRIOR. I have zero to fear because every battle I enter has already been one. I write before you a newer man than I even was yesterday. When I get a new revelation I do not sit still I react, because that is what warriors do. I declare all these things to give you permission to hold me accountable. If you ever feel like I am not doing these things, TELL me. Tell me so you can call me into greatest. I tell you this because my Father is singing to me "You're the best around nothing is ever going to keep you down." And guess what the funny thing is he is singing the same song to you.
