We left our ministry at CICRIN on Tuesday, November 27th.
As I stood alone on the deck of the ferry, leaning on the railing, with my headphones in, I was praying. “God, I just can't do it anymore. It's too hard. My heart is in too many pieces.”
As I wiped a tear from my cheek, the breeze blew through my hair.
“But I make it whole again.”
I closed my eyes as I soaked in His response.
I feel like my heart is in so many pieces. Clear Lake, Texas. Bonne Terre, Missouri. Springfield, Missouri. Liberty, Missouri. Kiev, Ukraine. Chiang Rai, Thailand. Patzibal, Guatemala. Tablon, Honduras. And now Omepte Island, Nicaragua.
It's so hard to invest all of yourself in a place and people, and then have to leave. But, the nature of the World Race is just that. A month is just enough time to really feel connected, and then you have to leave. The easy answer would be to disengage.
Logically, you can't keep taking away from something, and still have something in the end. It doesn't make sense.
But, that is the beauty of the Lord, and what He gives to us. He asks us to pour out, and He pours into us. Everlasting compassion. Everlasting grace. Everlasting love.
So, I will continue to give all of myself, because He makes my heart whole again. I choose to love, and I choose to sacrifice pieces of my heart, because the new heart that I am given is even better than before.
Thank you to the staff and children at CICRIN. It was a beautiful month. 🙂
