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con·fliction n. Psychology A psychic struggle, often unconscious, resulting from the opposition or simultaneous functioning of mutually exclusive impulses, desires, or tendencies.

This is where Josh and I are at right now.  We want with EVERYTHING in us to make our financial deadline, and to join our squad and our team at launch in Chicago.

We have a huge barrier in our way, though.  We are still about $5,500 short of making the deadline.  And we have to have it in about a week's time.  The deadline is August 18th, but it can take up to two weeks to process, so ideally it should be donated by August 4th.

There are a ton of great things about going on the Race as a married couple.  You get a built in buddy.  Someone who already knows you, and will be fighting for you.  We won't get as homesick, because we have the best part of home with us already.  You get to share wisdom from being in a different stage of life than other squadmates.

However, there is also a whole different set of struggles that come with being a married couple on the Race.  One of which is fundraising.

Fundraising has been a struggle from the start.  We have to raise twice as much, and have twice as much distance to cover for our deadlines.  It has been a long, hard battle.  It has caused us to postpone once already.

The confliction comes into play with our rationality.  Although we do feel like God has called us to the Race, it is hard not to try to rationalize it out that there is no way that that much can be raised in just a few days.  It is a possibility that God hasn't called us to the Race, but rather to the preparation for the Race.  We both have had exponential emotional and spiritual growth through this process.

We have grown in our individual spiritual lives.

We have grown in our marriage.

We have been able to spend tons of time with Josh's family.

I have learned that although it is hard, it is possible to live without my cats.

We have made amazing progress on paying off our credit card.

If this is the case, we don't want to be blindsided emotionally when we are not able to launch with L Squad.  We both agree that this is our last go at the Race (we have already postponed twice).  I am trying to be excited about both possibilities, and to be content with either outcome.  For one, if we do not go on the Race, I will get to live with my cats again!  That is a HUGE plus for me.

But, with all that said, we still desire with everything in us to make it to the Race.  Our passion lies in international ministry, and to have the possibility of living out that passion so close, and to just barely miss grasping it is heartbreaking.

But we are not giving up.

We are still fighting. 

I am a huge fan of the Olympics, which start tonight.  I've been in the Olympic mood today, and I've been listening to Survival by Muse (the official song of the London Olympics).

And I’ll light the fuse
And I’ll never lose
And I choose to survive
Whatever it takes
You won’t pull ahead
I’ll keep up the pace
And I’ll reveal my strength
To the whole human race
Yes I am prepared
To stay alive
I won’t forgive, the vengeance is mine
And I won’t give in
Because I choose to thrive


While I know it's not about us, and it is not anything that we do ourselves that will make it happen, I really like the line, "I'll choose to survive, whatever it takes."  Josh and I were discussing last night about how we are so conflicted, and wondering whether the feelings we were having about the possibility of not going were from being rational and trying to take control of the situation, or if we were really being called not to go.

There is also the possibility that these are all lies from the Enemy.  That he is trying to sabatoge us by getting us down. 

If that is the case, I REFUSE to validate them by taking part in them.  If we are supposed to stay home from the Race, I choose joy in that.  I choose to survive.  Whatever happens, I choose to thrive.

We still desire very much to go on the Race.  If you feel led to support us, you can in a few different ways.  If you would like to give online, just click that nice little link on the left side that says "Support Us", and follow the directions to give via credit or debit card.  If you give online, however, there is a 5% fee that is taken out to pay credit card company fees.

You can also mail a check to the Adventures in Missions office, and 100% of the donation will go to our support account.  Make the check out to Adventures in Missions, write Josh and Jen Mendenhall-The World Race on the memo line, and mail it to:

Adventures In Missions
P.O. Box 534470
Atlanta, GA 30353-4470

You can also pray for us!  We are in desperate need for prayer for our support account, personal finances, the rest of the logistical things we need to get in order before we leave, for emotional well being, being present in this time with our families, etc.

Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts!