I realized that the technical term for the ripple effect in
our lives is called transference. This is when an incident or various
incidences occur in someone’s life that affects his thought process or actions
later in life. For instance, a child may see his father physically abuse his
mother and may be conditioned to believe that behavior to be acceptable in a
relationship or that child may later have trust issues with male figures. At
such a young age, a child probably would not realize the importance of
discussing the implications of his feelings, nor would he be willing to discuss
something so difficult and possibly receive abuse himself. Therefore, he
suppresses those thoughts and begins shoveling dirt on the person deep inside.
So, until this child is able to gain freedom from this pain by reflecting on
his emotions, he may perpetuate this problem of abuse within a future
relationship and illustrate the same message to his son that his father
revealed to him.
Now, the
incident does not need to be severe to create a burden in someone’s life; it
could be something as small as a hurtful comment. A father could tell his child
that she is stupid and forever she may feel that she is insignificant; her
self-confidence and/or self-worth may have been severely damaged. Although this
cause and effect may seem to be a stretch, it only takes a simple drop of water
in someone’s life to create such a large ripple effect.
I have had the
opportunity to work with the YMCA in Gisborne, New Zealand for the past week.
It has been such a blessing to spend time with kids of all ages playing games
and learning about the kiwi culture. However, my thoughts are not focused so
much on the games we play but the lives of these children. When I look at the
children, I realize that each one has their own unique story and I can’t help
but think of the drops of water that have shaped their lives. Some have
experienced more than a drop of water. Some have experienced a tidal wave and I
can only imagine the ripple effect that this wave had on this child’s life and
how it will impact his future thoughts and actions. Everyone has a story shaped
by the drops (sometimes tidal waves) of water in their lives and with each
hurtful memory we pile on another shovel of dirt. However, no matter how many
piles of dirt we heave on to our lives, we need to remember that there is hope
for freedom. It may be extremely difficult to fight for that freedom but how
much longer will we bury ourselves under pain until we feel that freedom is
truly worth fighting for? The grace of our Lord is free but we must fight for our freedom from oppression so that we may truly be able to experience His grace in our lives.
Best of luck in your journeys to freedom!
