Warning: this is not a metaphor.
Coming in to the Race, I knew I would have experiences that
I would never forget, moments that I could not adequately explain. But I never
imagined a day like this.
Today, Michael and I went with our Ukranian friend, Rudy, to
a…wait for it….Russian Sauna. We had a few hints from Rudy about what this
entailed and were excited, if nervous, for a unique experience. Rudy took us to
an old rusty building that looked straight out of a horror film. The house was
right next to a very small airport, which looked as though it had not been
operational in years. As we approached, Rudy warned, “from here on, we only
speak in Russian, no English.” Which meant Michael and I were restricted to
“da.” There was a man in camouflage guarding the building and we silently shook
his hand and went inside.
We went through a couple rundown hallways and came to a set
of hooks. There, we took off all, and boy do I mean ALL, of our clothes. After
my teammate Michael and my ministry friend Rudy were all-naturale, we entered
the small door next to us.
Rudy has a group of men, 8 guys in total, that he does this
with every week. So we were expecting company. The others were not there yet,
which I was thankful for. There was a living room set up, with wood paneling on
walls and a strange red shade over the lighting that forced a pink hue in the
room. The room had a wooden door (the sauna) in one corner and a small pool
(which looked a lot like a baptismal) in the opposite corner. There was an adjacent
room (with no door) that held a couple wooden-plank beds.
Rudy allowed us an awkward strip of white cloth, ragged and
extremely thin. When I wrapped it around my waist, it would have been too short
to be a dress, even an extremely inappropriate one. But, considering the
extreme nakedness, I was thankful for anything.
Rudy led us in to the sauna and we sat for about ten minutes
in blistering heat. My skin sizzled. After we came and sat in the living room
and watched the steam billow off our bodies. The next time we came in, it was
just me and Rudy; Michael stayed out. The sauna was the size of a small closet.
When Rudy and I came in, I went to the second tier of bench, where Rudy had me
lay face down. The “towel” was now off again. Rudy took a bushel of branches (I
think they were birch or oak) and beat me with it. There was a big cluster of
leaves on the end of these branches. I lay there on my stomach, my feet bent in
the air because I was too tall for the room. Rudy, who for reasons still
unknown to me was wearing a Russian hat and heavy gloves, swatted me with the
leaves a few different ways. After a couple minutes, the other guys arrived,
and soon there was an audience of three naked strangers watching my beating.
The sauna, by the way, is scorching. It got too hot and Rudy brought in a cool
bucket of water and doused me (and the bench) for cold refreshment. It was
shocking. Rudy asked me to turn around on my “towel.” So, now facing upward,
the whole process began again, my audience still in tow. To say it was awkward
may be an obvious understatement, but it also felt really good. There was
something refreshing about those leaves and a never-escaping appreciation of a
wonderfully unique experience.
After leaving my beating, I jumped in to the cold pool
(baptismal). Then I went to the adjacent room and lay down to rest. I got some
fluids to keep hydrated. After a few minutes I joined the rest of the men in
the living room. There was cooking, especially some interesting pork and
veggies, and lots of conversation. Michael received his beating. We entered the
sauna, Michael and I together, one last time (while some other man was
receiving his beating), one more dip in the cold pool, a shower, and then the
return of my underwear. The guys gave us some steak before we left and it was
yummy.
The men we shared two naked hours with are all very wealthy
businessmen in Ukraine. They are not Christian. Rudy is part of this group
because his father is a part of it. It was very interesting to try to explain
why we are traveling the world, giving everything to serve and love Jesus. Rudy
hopes our conversation and fellowship will help challenge their money-centered
worldview.
It is an honor to be doing this adventure and loving Jesus
all over the world. Today, my vulnerability was tested, my humility forced upon
me, and fellowship and evangelism happened. We just happened to be nude.
