Fireplace in Eldorett, Kenya reminding me a little of home. Yeah, it was that cold at night at the equator!
I’m back in Kenya after spending two and a half weeks in Tanzania. We’ll be spending a day to rest before leaving to do more ministry with the Maasai for about ten days. And then we’ll be on a plane once again, leaving Africa. This life is tough, and it’s amazing. Yet I’m also ready for home. For the past 6 months, I’ve packed up all my stuff an average of twice per month. And this month we’ll have lived in five different places. I’ve been able to pour my heart out to hundreds if not thousands of people, yet most of them I’ll never see again on this earth
And yet – I wonder, what is home? Even if I did return to the United States today, what would I do? I look forward to spending lots of time with my family back in Michigan; I long to be able to spend some serious time back with really good friends at Michigan Tech. And I look forward to reconnecting with my community back in Montana. And yet I’d love to spend a few years in Alaska! Will God soon have me leave for more work overseas soon after I leave? I have no idea right now!
Yet is home really a place? Ever person on our squad here in Africa loves to see western toilets that flush, electricity, and running water. And yet I almost wonder if for me, these things mostly remind me of something that feels like home. Would Africans long to be back in their homes without electricity a few months after they moved to the United States? Would they long for food or a landscape that gives them that sense of comfort?
I been realizing the last few days once again that there is no place like home. And that home exists whereever we are. God’s drawing me into an intimacy with Him out here that I’ve never experienced this deep before. My desire for that intimacy is incredible and intense, and it’s something far bigger than any personal relationship will ever satisfy. Often times that desire feels way too intense, so much that I wonder if He’ll ever be able to satisfy. It’s tempting to run away from Him and find a way to deaden that desire. And yet I’m beginning to love times of worship and prayer together with my team in a way I never have before. I’m longing more and more to spend hours under the stars and the wind in the presence of my God. I love more and more to pray often for the people I love. I’m beginning to see that He is satisfying my desire for Him.
My Father in heaven is becoming home for me.
