Montenegro has been the hardest month on the race for me, so far. Not because of the conditions I was living in or the food I was eating or the heat, but because internally I had to process through quite a bit. I’m about to be real transparent, so get ready.
This month my team and I did not have a set ministry each day. We were told to go out and tell people about Jesus. Those that know me can attest to the fact that I am very much a task-oriented person. I like to have something set before me and I take pride in finishing that task, and finishing it well.
So, because of what our ministry was supposed to be this month, I was at a loss. I felt so unproductive and lazy. We were absolutely going out and ‘doing’ stuff each day, but I kept feeling so unfulfilled. I just kept feeling like we weren’t doing enough. And if I’m being honest with myself, at the end of the day I wanted to feel like Jesus was patting me on the back and telling me “Job well done, Jodi”. I think subconsciously I was thinking that the more I do, the more Jesus will love me. The more people I talked to, the more Jesus would love me. The more miles I put on my feet that day, the more Jesus would love me. I KNOW this isn’t truth, but sometimes we allow these little lies to get in our head and we start to believe them.
Finally, one day Jesus hit me over the head and woke me up. I finally heard Him saying, “Jodi, don’t you get it? You don’t have to do anything to make me love you or be proud of you”. At first I was like, okay yeah God I get it, I know. The more I thought about it, the more I realized just how much I walk in that each and every day.
I have been walking with the Lord since I was 8 years old. And unbeknownst to me, I have lived for a long time trying to please God by my works. I didn’t even know I did this. But once we had a month where we literally had to wait on the Lord and hear from Him, it caused me to examine myself and my own heart. I realized I have always subconsciously thought that that the more things I did would make the Lord be pleased with me. I knew in my heart this wasn’t truth but my head was struggling.
Here’s the truth: Jesus came so we can have freedom. Freedom from sin and bondage. Jesus IS freedom. The truth is folks, He isn’t going to love me any more or any less than what He does right now. No matter what. End of story. His work was done and finished on the cross!!!
To quote Jesus, in my favorite book of the Bible, “IF THE SON SETS YOU FREE, YOU ARE FREE INDEED” (John 8:36). Why don’t more Christians (myself included) live like this? Through giving our hearts to Jesus and having a relationship with Him, we can walk in so much freedom. Does this give us freedom to sin? By no means. Galatians 5:20 tells us “For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” This gives us freedom to walk in the fullness of this life that Jesus gives us. This gives us freedom to not live inside a work based religion, like so many others in the world, and live a life full of freedom in Christ.
People, don’t a live a life in bondage. Don’t be so tied up in rules and religion that you are not walking in the freedom that Christ our Savior gives us. He’s the real deal.
So, if you’re caught up in feeling like you need to please God by DOING something, you came to the right blog today. Know that there is freedom in Christ because of what He did for us on the Cross. We don’t have to do anything to make Him love us. All the work that needed to be done was done on the Cross. If you have any questions about this, please reach out to me. I don’t have all the answers and I won’t pretend to, but I would love to have a conversation with you about this.
