We were asked to write a blog about how we felt before leaving on this mission trip. Here is what I’m expecting ….
“There are better things ahead than any we leave behind.” C.S. Lewis
Where to even begin? My mind has been consumed with every facet of this mission trip for the past couple of months now. From to-do lists to support raising to gear shopping and more. And somewhere tucked away between these logistics are my worries and fears and excitements and hopes. They are recorded in no particular order:
– to be hot
– to be tired
– to be embarrassed at some point along the journey
– to realize my utter depravity
– in light of the above, embrace His fullness and abundance
– have my heart broken again and again and again ….
– to learn what breaks His heart
– to have a better world view and a bigger picture of what God is up to
– see people as God sees them and not my snap judgments
– come to a better understanding of what life is really about
– to appreciate the simplicity of things
– to question why I ever signed up for this!
– to be uncomfortable and want out
– to be vulnerable and learn to be okay with it (however painful that process might be)
– to be frustrated with myself
– to eat things that I wish I didn’t have to
– to see things I never even dreamed about
– to do and experience things I never thought possible
– to cry a lot
– to miss my family and friends – a lot
– to love like I never have before
– to get over “needing space” and embrace a new level of intimacy
– to be sick
– to want a haircut
– to freak out a little bit about the cultural toilet differences!
– to be surprised by God’s goodness (I have already been blown away by thus far on this journey)
– to see some of God’s creation that will move me to tears
– to learn the language of prayer and dependency
– to rely on the Holy Spirit
– to miss my bed and driving
– to be exposed for who I am
– to be unsure about a lot of what I am seeing and doing
– to rest soundly in the arms of my Father’s embrace (each night on my 1.5 inch thick thermarest)
