During this whole World Race process, most of the things I read or hear from current or past racers are to drop ALL of my expectations, this includes training camp. Well I tried and thought I had succeeded in that and done pretty well going to training with out expectations.
Before I went I had heard things about camp and all, and was really excited to go and experience it. I kept hearing different things and even became nervous about it. Ironically something I learned at camp this past week, was that sometimes you don’t know you have expectations until they aren’t met. (mmm… good right?)
So I am sitting here on the last day of camp, and I can certainly say I had expectations coming into camp. Some were met, but others were not. Here is a list of different expectations and realities I may have had:
FOOD:
Expectation: It would be gross, not normal food, preparing us for the other countries delicacies; I didn’t think they would feed us a lot.
Reality: We did get a taste of multiple cultures, fish head soup (surprisingly not bad), We did eat three times a day, and usually had more than enough.
PEOPLE:
Expectation: I thought many people were going to be adventurous, people that have already done things like this already, loud and crazy. I also fed into the lie that they were going to be “perfect” and “better” than me.
Reality: They were all beautiful, kind, and caring. There was a nice balance of extroverts and introverts. We all became united from day one. No one is perfect, and we all had our “stuff”, to take care of, and I’m so glad we were there for each other to do it! They became family in just a week.
SLEEPING ARRANGEMENTS:
Expectations: I thought I would be in MY tent all week. I was worried, because I had only gone camping twice.
Reality: Well I wasn’t in my tent all week. I did go through a few “firsts” of sleeping places this week though. (sorry I cannot go into too much detail, I wouldn’t want to ruin it for future racers!!). I will say, sleeping under the stars was by far my favorite night!! I loved it
GOD:
Expectations: I thought this week would be a spiritual high, a revival. I expected God to help me in my boldness and confidence, in who I am in Him.
Reality: I was wrecked this week. I was angry and frustrated. This week was supposed to be a revival, a place where I could light my very tired fire before I go out to the nations. Instead I became frustrated, angry, and farther from God then I have been in a while. I was filling up on lies of not being His, how I am unworthy, and that everyone around me sees Him except for me. Finally the reality hits. The desperate desire and longing for Him and His word, pushed me to do just that. I searched and searched. I read the word, and sought His voice. Relief. Comfort. Revival. Knowing that when I am pushed the farthest and seeking Him still, I see Him inside of me. I am His daughter. I am a beautiful daughter of God, and I cannot wait to share that with the world, and completely lean on Him in everything I do!
Enjoy a few pictures of this past week. And look for my next blog describing my Team for the year.
Tent city!!!
Some beautiful girls That i now call sisters
Whole squad at Squad Wars! H SQUAD!!!! (we won too!!!)
All the girls
and of course our MEN!
