Seven months later from being accepted to take part in the World Race, I think it’s time to write a blog entry. Well, it is beyond time to write a blog entry. I’ve discovered that I’ve been selfish with my time and just haven’t set aside any whatsoever for this little gem. It. Is. Well. Overdue. So where should I start? I’ll start at the beginning of my World Race process.
It started well before the application was filled out. I had heard of the World Race about three years ago, and it had just lodged itself in my heart. At the time, I was too young to apply. And frankly, I was just not anywhere close to being in a place where this journey was right for me yet. Not until the year of 2012. This last winter, I took a trip to Uganda and Kenya. Now, if you’ve read the “About Me� section of my blog, or you just know me, you would know that foreign missions has just always been “my thing.� It’s always been what the Lord has placed in my heart to do. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t feel called to be a missionary. Uganda and Kenya was a start to my new journey. Before, I was too busy with school or work to pursue missions for longer than a two-week period. It was in Africa where I realized that I wasn’t a child anymore, and I didn’t have to be living the life everyone in America said I should be. At the age of 21, I “should� have been pursuing my bachelor’s degree in something prestigious and dreaming about a career. Instead, I was dreaming of the world and what the Gospel would look like through the lens of the “least of these.� I wanted more than anything to love these people whose lives looked much different than mine. I longed to know their stories and their hearts, their dreams and their passions. I wanted to see them how Christ sees them. And love as Christ loves us all.
In March of this year, it was getting to me that it had been two months since being home from Africa and I was still unsure of what my next step was. A conversation I had with one of my team members (from Africa) was about a place to call home. You see, I’m from Oklahoma and I’ve only lived outside of Oklahoma for a short seven weeks in my life. Oklahoma is my home. Despite those facts, I don’t always feel like Oklahoma is my home. The truth is, I’ve never felt as at home as I have when I was furthest from it. When I share my heart with people about mission work, sometimes all I can get out is, “It just feels like home.� It feels like home to hold a child in a third world country and give them my heart. It feels like home to serve the widow by repairing her falling apart living quarters. It feels like home to be away from a ridiculous amount of abundance. It feels like home to share in hope that only the least of these can know. It feels like home in the center of God’s will for my life. And therefore, the World Race is a step in the direction of home.
I’m not sure if that makes sense to you at all, but I tried. Basically, I feel like I’m right where I belong when I’m out on the mission field. On March 1st of this year, I came up with a list of pros and cons for the World Race and one other option I was considering. And that was all I needed to do to figure out the next step the Lord had for me. The World Race is a great opportunity for many reasons. It’s eleven countries in eleven months working with ANY kind of ministry you can imagine. In the past, I’ve worked with children mostly on mission trips, and I absolutely love it. But often times I’ve wondered if maybe there were other ministries out there that I could fall in love with. The WR is going to expose me to all types of ministries and I look forward to growing and learning from these experiences. And just maybe I’ll begin to get a grasp on what type of ministry the Lord is leading me to work with in the long run. I’ve also never felt like I’ve been called to a specific country or region. After Uganda and Kenya, I thought that was it. My heart was sold out for these nations. But there was still a little something stirring in me to keep going. Maybe God has more to show me in other parts of the world. And I CANNOT wait to discover all that He has for me there.
I know it’s not going to be easy. Sometimes it’s going to be really hard. And even though I feel at home on the mission field, I probably will miss my home here in Oklahoma often. I have a pretty legit family and an amazing group of friends. And even the bestest friend God could have blessed me with (yeah, I’m that girl with the most amazing best friend ever and totally bragging about it.. Forgive me). And this is the hardest part about leaving. Imagining all of the things I’m going to miss in eleven months. And I feel as if eleven months really isn’t that long, yet so much can happen in that time.
But then I remember. I remember the clearest of directions I’ve ever heard from my God. I remember the moment I knew without a doubt that this is what HE has for me right now. And I remember what an amazing opportunity it is and that I should push through the fear because it’s not my strength I’m relying on. HIS strength is made perfect in my weakness. And HE receives full glory for all of it. HE is calling me to sell everything and follow after HIM. HE calls me to serve and put others before my own selfish ambition. I am broken and weary, but HE is ready to mold me and make me in HIS way. HE calls me to bless others so that I may be enriched and watered in my faith. HE calls me to cry out on their behalf and seek HIM so that HE may reveal himself in some way through me to them. HE is my Lord. And I can’t wait to take this journey with HIM and for HIS glory.
