June 3 Speaking of prayers I have been praying ever since Guatemala (first prayer on a bus) that You would give me a rainbow for my birthday. I've been a little hesitant to type this prayer. Don't know why? I have been praying it though. However I feel concerned with "what if there is no rainbow on my birthday" Is it wrong for me to ask you for this (testing)? I know my faith will not change either way! My rainbows have always came through tears before. I just really want an answered beautiful miracle from You. I want to be moved to romantic tears that You would do this for me. I'm going to pray every day/ night until my birthday for a birthday gift rainbow! Lord I pray You understand that my request is not misguided and that on my birthday I will be moved to tears, moved to my knees, and have a beautiful testimony! Thank You Lord that You listen. Thank You Lord that You love me so much. Thank You Lord that you answer my prayers. Thank You for my 2009 birthday rainbow. Thank You for the going to work rainbow. Thank You for my "first letter"(to You) rainbow. Thank You for my support raising rainbow. Thank You for rainbows in Swaziland (our month of romance,) Thank You for rainbows … They are so special and so beautiful. Lord, please let me have a birthday rainbow. I want to commit to pray about this every day and see that You give me the desires of my heart. I want this prayer and that rainbow to glorify You!
June 4 I pray lord for my birthday rainbow. I can't wait to have the best birthday ever. Nothing will ever mean more than getting the gift I want most from You! Then being able to share this with others Your love and promises … the power of prayer!
June 5 I pray for my birthday rainbow. I pray it appears and moves me to my knees and tears (I know it will) I fantasize about it and how it will feel but can only imagine. I know I will have to make it my final big blog!
June 7 I saw a rainbow painted on the wall of a building while I was on the bus today. I got a sick feeling in my stomach. I forgot to pray for my rainbow last night. I will try to not let this discourage me but it put doubt and failure in my heart. I know these are not spirits of you though. Please forgive me for forgetting. I really really want a birthday rainbow. I think I've been overwhelmed (joyful, busy, excited) by all the other present answered prayers. So lord, I thank you for listening to me and lovingly answering me. I thank you that you know my heart… And that with You i feel so loved, protected, and provided for always. I can't wait for my birthday present from You!! I pray it is a special "promise" day. I pray for my beautiful rainbow!
June 8 … I pray for my birthday rainbow… I pray you are already thinking about it, know about it, & see it and can't wait to surprise me with the best birthday present ever.
June 9 I pray for my birthday rainbow. I feel sometimes like a begging child asking you. I really want a rainbow as much as any gift I've ever asked for. I'm going to fall asleep thinking about it.
June 10 … I also started thinking about my Bday rainbow. Wondering if you already know what it looks like. Where it will be. How I will see it. I was thinking how beautiful it will be. How it will make me feel. I've imagine things before in life that I was excited about … dates, presents, vacations, dances, parties … Because I feel in control and know they will happen I get super excited. I know I'm excited about this but in a different way. I know there is a part of me that lacks faith that I will get my rainbow because Your in control. Will my faith not be strong enough for You to give it to me? Are you going to not give me a rainbow to test my faith in You further? Are you excited and know how special this is and how it will strengthen us? Are you excited to give me something so beautiful and so obvious (that only you can give me) and move me to tears? Are You excited for this to add to our "Love Story" (my testimony!) I am!!!! I really pray that I please You …that when You see me and my future it is solid with You … I pray because of this You will always give me the desires of my heart … Especially rainbows!
June 11 I'm really tired! Lord you know my heart & my prayers ……. My Birthday Rainbow! Thank You that You love me, that You have plans for me, and Thank You That our communication grows everyday. Thank You for hearing my prayers and caring about my desires.
June 12 I pray for my birthday rainbow … I pray for the best present a girl could ever get from her first & true love … Her God!!!! I pray for this beautiful icing to our "Love Story" I promise to share this story … My life story … Rainbow stories with others, especially women!!!
June 13 Reading Isaiah 7 today and scripture 11 stood out "ask the Lord Your God for a sign whether in the deepest depths or in the highest heights." … Made me think of my birthday rainbow … A sign of Your relationship with me … A sign of our great future together …I would look for signs for relationships with men through out my life ….read into things they would say etc. … But this is me wanting a sign of OUR relationship … Confirmation/ Affirmation of our love and communication. This scripture has been encouraging for me and of course it was "eleven" again 😀 … I pray lord for my birthday rainbow … I pray for the beautiful grand good part of our story .. The finishing touch on my journey with You … The perfect gift to end my story and begin anew with You! Thinking about this makes me smile and I'm excited to share it!
June 14 … I smiled as I thought about my birthday rainbow … Thinking God loves me and answers! This thought gives me butterflies of excitement thinking about how amazing I will feel when I see it! I know I wont be able to stop crying and I'll never want it to go away. I'll get pictures!!! … I pray for a beautiful birthday rainbow that seals up my year… and is the beginning of a story of love and faith that will never be broken! A story I will share with everyone … Women … In churches … So exciting!
June 15 I'm in bed it's almost 1am. I was listening to some of our songs and almost asleep. Then I remembered, I almost forgot, My rainbow prayer! Lord please let me have a beautiful rainbow on my birthday And brag about us and Your love and faithfulness …I'll give You all the GLORY (our word this year!)
June 16 I pray for my birthday gift from You … A beautiful rainbow! I just know it would make for a great finish to my race. A miracle in my testimony And a beautiful start to rest of my life with You. I pray You feel the same!
June 17 I pray for my birthday rainbow. It is hard to ask today. I feel undeserving. I still want my rainbow like I want my life to be consumed by You with goodness and light (nothing like today)
June 18 I pray for the last month and a half of this race… I want to have fun, make memories, and serve You well. I pray that I have the best birthday ever … "Princess" topped of with a miracle rainbow from my first love … So romantic! I can't wait.. I love you so much Lord… And I want this love to just continue to grow, strengthen and inspire others. I pray I have great stories and blogs (especially my birthday rainbow finale)
June 19 I pray for my birthday rainbow … I had butterflies in my tummy thinking about it this morning/ last night … This day was so long I can't remember what was today … Things that happened this morning feel like yesterday. I'm trying to remain confident and faithful in this prayer and not fear it being unanswered.
June 20 The subject of best moments on the race … Or miracles .. Or ways God showed up / moved on the race comes up often … Especially since we are nearing the end and Jessica is making a squad video with all of us. I always think my biggest moment is getting ready to happen … It won't make the video… My birthday rainbow! I think about it and glow with excitement. Thank You lord for hearing my prayers loving me… Thank you for promises … Thank you for rainbows … Thank you that I could surrender safely in You! I pray we shine in a beautiful miraculous way … Topping off our journey … Our love story … Our new beginning with a Rainbow!
June 21 I'm sitting under a shade tree in the yard. Its a hot clear day … To hot to be inside. Kind of day I'd want to take my bug out (top down) I'm so glad I still have her to go home too 😀 I do love that car and Im thankful for it. I had my first rainbow (July 14th 2009) from you in her! … I pray for my birthday rainbow… I committed to ask every night but I feel like a nag tonight. I just want you to know how much it means and how much I really want it.
June 22 I pray I can fall asleep with happy thoughts of just You and I … Dreams visions & fantasy of my birthday rainbow … I thank You that we have this special romantic beautiful symbol … I thank You that we communicate … That You love me … Know my prayers, desires … And want me to be happily Yours forever. I thank You that You always find ways to remind me You are with me and love me … I thank You for creation and mostly rainbows … I thank You for my birthday rainbow (the first and the one next month) … Our story.. I pray I honor you with "Glory" every time I share it!
June 23 As this day continued I got sicker and sicker … By midnight I was sitting on the bathroom floor by the toilet crying. Sharp stomach pains, diarrhea, fever, chills, & body aches. I was too weak to keep getting out of my tent and walking the distance to the bath house. So, I spent most of the night in a bathroom stall. All I wanted was a warm bed , an IV, & my mommy! Didn't pray for my rainbow 🙁
June 24 STILL SICK
June 25 I pray for my last race month with You…. To be special, defining, inspiring, empowering, heartwarming… Full of love & laughter … Carry me up close in Your will … That I will never come back down to my old worldly ways. I pray for an amazing month that sums up the race so perfectly (like You)! I pray for a beautiful birthday rainbow!! I did envision it a while when I was awake during my sick time.
June 26 Went to sleep in my sleeping bag under the stars (outside/ No iPad) I slept in the grass alongside my team and a few orphan boys. The sky was partly stars and partly cloudy. I prayed in my head before I fell asleep. I prayed for family, friends, and supporters (answered?) I prayed for my rainbow (answered?) I prayed we would be safe out in the open (answered!) I prayed it wouldn't rain on us (answered!)
June 27 I pray for my next month to be incredible in a way that could only be You! I pray for good ministry that feels custom from You To me… I pray for my birthday to include a beautiful rainbow … Love from my heavenly father to me!
June 28 I pray for my last month of ministry may it be packed full of gifts and surprises that define the journey and deeply ingrain all my spiritual growth. I pray for my birthday blessing …. To come lovingly from You … As a rainbow!
June 29 I pray for an amazing month in Nicaragua with my team! I pray to have my best birthday ever topped of with a rainbow from You! I pray for heartwarming ministry custom made from You to each of us! I pray for more spiritual growth, healing, strength, and wisdom to take home.
June 30 (Travel Day- from Honduras to Nicaragua) thought my prayers and exhaustedly passed out
July 1 I looked at the sky several times and thought … There has to be a rainbow on my birthday … It was gray and sunny today … If the weather remains mostly the same …it's so possible (wish I could stop doubting!)… Its beautiful comfortable and breezy here! I really really hope You give me a rainbow!
July 2 I pray for this special month together You and I. I pray for stories… I pray for fun … I pray for the children … I pray for my special touch here … I pray for my team … I pray for my birthday rainbow … I pray for our love story … Our Fairytale!
July 3 As we were walking down the street Kristen said …"Ooh Jess look!" There was a rainbow! 😀 It was a nice little pick me up. Thank You I was feeling a little down (doubtful.) Then I realized I try to control my own romances and that never got me anything but disappointment. I will be happy with whatever rainbows you give me. However, my birthday gift is the most important one!
July 4 (I fell asleep thinking about my birthday rainbow and dreamt about it too. Hoping, praying, and wishing it happens!)
July 5 I Thank You for this ministry and the creative freedom I have here. I worked on my daily schedule with the children today. Of course everyday was color coded a different color of the rainbow. I cant wait to see your rainbow plan for me!
July 6 (no written rainbow prayer)
July 7 Laying in my hostel. Inside the crater of an old volcano. Listening to the monkeys and night critters. Wow… amazing… Thank You! You always provide beautiful things in this world when we just take the time to notice. I can't wait to notice my rainbow Lord!
July 8 Getting back home, from the volcano, was a long adventure I took some video. The sky was partly sunny / partly cloudy ( Like everyday here) I searched for a rainbow but I didn't see one. I thought about Us, our relationship, & my birthday rainbow. Thought what if I don't get my rainbow? Whenever the doubt comes in I push it out quickly. Lord, I pray this is the beginning of great things for this month. I pray I please You each day … Serving You & others well. I pray each day of this month is so special and memorable! My birth month, my last month of the race, & my birthday … I want amazing stories to share of the best for last! A love story … Fairytale … Topped off with a rainbow message!
July 9 (Fell asleep reading)
July 10 (Took Fernando ,orphan boy, to the hospital this night. Prayed in my head before I fell asleep.)
July 11 My birthday is only 3 days away…. The girls keep asking what I would like to do. I don't know there isn't much here. I hope its good and I'm not sick. I'm most excited about my rainbow and I keep having to fight off doubt. Lord, I pray that a beautiful rainbow is Your will as part of our "Love Story" I can share. I know I haven't been typing my rainbow prayer every night but it is on my mind everyday. I hope to catch up on some journaling tomorrow (when I feel better.)
July 12 (Sick and slept almost all of the 24hrs)
July 13 I'm praying I'm better by my birthday tomorrow. … I'm excited about my birthday and being 37 … I know it's going to be a great year. I pray you bless my birthday tomorrow with the girls (BA) I pray it is the best I've had in a long time. I'm nervous about our rainbow… the what if's (doubt). It means so much … However it is in your power and will…. And I know I don't deserve it … I won't stop loving you and I will know You are trying to say something … But I will be so heartbroken if I don't get my rainbow… Just thinking about laying in bed tomorrow night with out one … Makes me cry. I'm trying to be positive and believe … But I'm more scared right now. Lord whatever Your will or plan is (rainbow or no rainbow) I pray You help me understand and grow closer to You!
