It was just like any other day at the orphanage- kids running, playing, & soaking up every last ounce of the setting afternoon sun. But sitting on a couch, its weathered fibers resembling something found in the back corners of a neighborhood garage sale, I was struck with a proposition to surely melt ones heart. One of my girls, who I’ll refer to as Polly (names must be changed for confidentiality reasons), & I were having a lovely time reading, playing, & just enjoying life. Her incessant laughter & giggling slowing began to subside as she nestled her head into my lap. Then, with her bright brown eyes staring up at me, in a tone so innocent & sincere it could barely be heard she whispered ” Tita, will you be my mom?”.
Everything in me wanted to affirm her request. I wanted to pick her up, spin her around, & tell her she would never be without a home again. I wanted to tell her that I would love her forever, that she belonged somewhere & I would never leave. But my mind soon interceded my heart, as reality set in. I, of course, am in no place to support a child; yet, in that brief moment I was carried away with the lovely thought of revolutionizing Polly’s life.
I guess my real question is what are we doing?? What am I doing? Am I truly helping through my short term investment or am I actually doing more damage to their already fragile hearts? This is one of those things in which I don’t have a positive, concise resolution. I am still processing through it all. I am, however, finding peace in the fact that the Lord has placed us in this ministry & he wouldn’t do so if there were no purpose. So for now, I will remain obedient, but my mind just can’t seem answer the question:
