Packing up and leaving everything that’s comfortable behind to go travel the world and encounter the unknown… How awesome and exciting! You only live life once and believe me, this life is so much more than I had ever expected. But there’s always the flip side of the coin.
A couple weeks ago, I got really sick with an awful stomach bug. I was put out for about 24 hours along with my girlfriend, Sarah. Within these 24 hours Sarah and I watched tons of movies, slept tons of hours, and shared tons of stories about home.
I miss my mom and dad. I miss my sister. I miss my puppy. I miss my bed. I miss my house. I miss my room. I miss my closet full of clothes. I miss my assortment of shoes. I miss driving. I miss my shower.
You have to leave home. You have to leave what’s comfortable. You have to say goodbye to your comfy bed, your assortment of clothes, and your warm shower. By doing this you get to experience things differently; uniquely. The race invites you to live life in raw form without your comforts to hide in. There are so many awesome things about this lifestyle, but inevitably you will miss the comfortable. You will miss home.
As much as I expected homesickness to happen it hit me like a ton of bricks. Ever since leaving for the race, I’ve been hitting the ground running and diving into what God has for me here. I knew in my head that this was for 11 months of my life, but my heart was slowly catching up. This is my life. Not just a short, fun trip around the world… No. It’s my LIFE!
Ever since leaving El Shaddai everything from home has been haunting my thoughts; along with the memories of El Shaddai. I can’t stop thinking about my girls there, my babies there, my family there. I see their faces when walking through the towns here in South Africa. I reread their letters they gave me the day I left. I pray for them continuously and wonder what God’s doing in their lives. I miss them like crazy and I hope and pray that God’s will leads me back to them one day; back to El Shaddai.
Once I start getting used to a place it’s already time to pack up and leave. This is the story of my life, not just on the race, but my entire life. Being a traveling actress I learned that home is where you make it. While in the states, my main home is in Kutztown, Pennsylvania where my parents live, but I also have homes scattered all over the country. New York City, Washington DC, Manteo North Carolina, Winchester Virginia, Richmond Virginia, Manheim Pennsylvania; the list goes on and on. Now I realize that the list is only growing. I can now add Dondo Mozambique, El Shaddai Swaziland, and Muizenberg South Africa to the list.
Home is also where the heart is and this year I am following God’s heart and finding home where he leads me. Even on the days when it gets hard and I start to miss my other homes I still trust that He has me exactly where he wants me. I am home. I make this my home. I don’t forget where I come from, but I look ahead to what’s in store for me. I trust that God's leading my footsteps and is holding my hand wherever I go. Wherever he leads me… I am home.
