Nepal is a beautiful country. In Kathmandu, you’re literally surrounded by mountains on all sides. Sunsets are breathtaking and the stars look brighter on the rooftop at 2am. Homes are colorful, ornate, ordinary, sad, and beautiful at once. There are temples, monkeys walking on power lines, fiddle playing peddlers, late night momo stands on the street, and a “North Face” store (or five) on every corner. You can catch a micro bus around town for about a quarter but be prepared to be one of 25 in a 12 passenger van. Taxis are tiny, but that doesn’t mean five adults can’t ride together. (Yes, Darren’s in there too!)
This month, my team and I were staying just outside of Kathmandu. The place we slept was also the place we worked, helping to build a building that will, in the future, house our amazing hosts as well as a training center and business headquarters. Without going into too much detail, because things are tricky here with believers, just know that God is doing amazing things through these people. During the day we sanded, painted, constructed water filters, thermal mass rocket heaters (where the flame burns horizontally – trippy), and made about 200 hay bales.
One of the best parts of this month was getting a different perspective on what being a missionary actually is. So far, I’ve had the chance to live with locals in each country and see how they do ministry. This month, I was able to observe how foreigners are simply being salt and light wherever God places them. They are just living a life that glorifies God in a land that isn’t their first home. Isn’t that what all believers are called to do…live a life that glorifies God?
For years I’ve known God is calling me to ministry. During many of those years I tried to ignore him, but God cannot be refused. So, I came on the World Race because that’s what God is telling me to do, not knowing what is going to happen next in my life. I have felt God calling me to missions and resigned myself to being a missionary because my heart won’t let me sleep while planning to live a “normal life” in the States. But the Christians I met in Nepal helped me to see what God has been trying to tell me all along. What I knew, but forgot during the busyness of doing instead of being. No matter what I do, do it for the glory of God. No matter where I live, live a life that honors God. No matter what job I have, or ministry I involve myself with, work for God’s glory and not my own.
I got so caught up with trying to define what God was telling me to do that I couldn’t see that it was never about what I do or where I live, but rather who I am as I do it. Yes, I still feel like I’m supposed to be in ministry, and the thought of living overseas still doesn’t thrill, but I keep realizing that I will never be happy unless I’m doing what God is telling me to do. The life that God has called me, and all believers to live, won’t change with location. I find myself trying to convince God to let me stay Stateside, thinking that somehow it will mean I can have the typical “American Dream” type of life. But what I failed to realize is that whether or not I wind up living in the States or another country, I am not called to live that American Dream. And that is what I’m resisting. Somewhere inside I still want the walk-in pantry, tire swing, flowers lining the sidewalk and a huge dog chasing kids in the front yard. But I know that pursuing that life over God, Himself, will get me nowhere.
I thought I was struggling between being a missionary or staying at home, but I am seeing that the issue was never to be or not to be – it was always who will I serve; me or God?
I still don’t know what will happen next or where I will live after the Race, but I do know who I’m called to be and who I’m called to serve. Maybe I will have a semblance of American normality…maybe not. I don’t have to know the end, I just have to trust and that’s enough for now.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from Nepal!
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Please help me stay on the World Race for the last 5 months and consider donating to my account today. I need to be fully funded ASAP! 🙂
