It's been said that there are 2 things in life that are certain, death and taxes. I want to submit something else that I don't think many people consider even though it can have just as great an impact on our lives. I'm talking about change. Whether you recognize it or not change is all around us. It could be something as common as the weather outside or as complex as the cellular respiration (sorry, I haven't had a nerd moment in a while) that drives the function of our bodies. Whether we acknowledge it or not and, quite frankly, whether we like it or not in some form or fashion change will come, usually at the most inopportune moment, at least as we define it. The last 6 months have been filled with constant change as I have prepared to leave the country. It all came to a climax just over a week ago I said 'goodbye' to a town that (this may be a surprse to some of my Knoxville friends) had actually begun to rub off on me. (wait, it gets better) So much so that I began to see myself settling down there. I said 'see you later' to friends that had become an important part of my life and loved me in spite of my many flaws. I said 'thank you' to a church that had nurtured me in my home away from home and challenged me to fall more in love with Jesus and I said 'you're welcome' to a group of people that, even though they couldn't always understand why I did things the way that I did, they understood, for the most part, why I was doing them. These changes have happened so fast, especially in the last month or so since Training Camp, that I have barely had time to process them and to soak in these last few precious moments with those that mean the most to me. Many times I've been asked what I'm feeling about leaving and if I'm ready to go and my answer has typically been 'I don't know' or something very similar. I know that sounds like I'm avoiding the question or being rude but, honestly, it's the best answer that I can come up with at this point. I honestly don't know what I'm feeling and there have been several days when things have moved so fast that I have felt incredibly unprepared, both spiritually and financially, and that has caused me to wonder if I will be able to get, and keep, myself together in time.
For the next 11 months change will be a way of life. Every 30 days the location will change, the people that I minister to will change, and the food will change. This fast-paced lifestyle that I suspect will be the norm isn't something that I've been used to growing up in the South. With all of the change that will be occuring on the outside, it's the change that will happen on the inside that I anticpate and maybe even to a certain degree fear, the most. I have the opportunity to dig deeper with Jesus and actually be a Christian. Not the prosperity-based, watered-down version that America portrays to rest of the world but the actual, literal, life-giving hands and feet of Jesus and to learn what it means to abandon everything for the sake of his call.
