“…the Lord our God said to us, ‘You have stayed at this mountain long enough. It is time to break camp and move on…’” Deuteronomy 1:6-7
For a long time now, I’ve wanted to break free and just go. Go where? Anywhere! But I never left. I remained here, where I felt safe and wouldn’t have to worry about anything. I thought I wouldn’t have to worry about anything, but I did. I never really did what I wanted to do. I pretended to be someone I wasn’t and in the end tricked myself into believing I was that person. In the last 2 years, God has introduced me to the Jackie He created and I am still learning to be who He’s called me to be.
I love how God works. The day I cried out to Him and asked Him to give me a sign I didn’t expect my life to change. I was hoping certain things would change, but I never imaged a complete transformation. It seemed like every day, I was being pushed, a.k.a. encouraged, to do something beyond me. I didn’t listen to that push ‘til about 6 months after I’d cried out to God. In August of 2013, I finally listened to one specific push and that lead to a domino effect. I began to listen and started taking those leaps of faith, like Peter I started to walk on water.
I didn’t leave the city I grew up in after I graduated high school, because I didn’t want to leave my mountain, my family, they were my comfort zone. The thought of leaving excited me, but at the same time scared me and my fear held me back. I couldn’t move, so I remained where I felt safe. It’s funny how after a year of knowing and walking with Jesus I was given an awesome opportunity. I was given the opportunity to go on my first mission trip. Growing up, I always wanted to be that person who went to another country to help others. I heard others from school talk about their experience and I wanted to be part of changing someone’s life. When I heard about the mission trip I was hesitant, because I had never left home, especially by myself and for a week, and I didn’t have the money for it. But a wonderful mentor of mine reminded me that if God was telling me to go that I had to go. Well, I questioned it no more and my desire and dream to go didn’t even allow me to think about the fact that I would be leaving my mountain, family, for a week. And so I started fundraising. I never told my parents I was leaving, just my brothers and sister knew. I knew my parents would convince me not to go, so I couldn’t tell them at least not yet. And then my mom found out on Facebook almost 2 months later. Needless to say in September 2014, I went on that mission trip, feel in love, felt God’s Presence so near, and I knew I had to go back. My mountain, my comfort zone was no longer found with my family. God had told me to “Go,” and now home didn’t feel right. I needed to step out and take a huge leap of faith, because God had something in store.
Fall 2014, would be my last semester at the college I was at and I was ready to start applying to transfer over to another school, when God interrupted those plans. He asked me to give him a year, just me and him. That same semester, I was interning at my church, which had become a new mountain for me, and he asked me to leave the internship. This was super hard for me, I don’t think I had ever cried so much, but he comforted me and let me know that he had something planned. At the end of December, He let me know that I need to get ready and of course I asked for what, but He didn’t say what. He just said, “Get physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually ready,” and oh how I struggled with the “physically” part. Our year together began and I didn’t get the “physically” part until the end of March. After two in a half months of getting it down, He let me know what I was “getting ready” for.
I love sleep dearly and can fall asleep as soon as I hit the pillow, but one night in June, it just wasn’t happening. So I started texting a friend, reading a book, and all of a sudden I look up to my dream board and out of everything on it, two words stood out “adventure awaits.” That was weird and then I look at the book I was reading and it’s talking about mission work and dreams. And then my friend starts telling me about his dreams and how he’d like to travel. Now to me all this was strange and I had to ask God what He was trying to tell me, because I wasn’t getting it. Well, God made it very clear and instantly put The World Race on my heart. Ekkk! I’m still very close to my family and the thought of leaving them for 11 months would have completely freaked me out 2 years ago and I would’ve said, “NO!” Now I will be honest, I was like, “God, you said one year and then I was going back to school,” and He replied with, “If I would of told you more than a year you would’ve said no,” and I probably would have. So I applied and fees had to be paid and at the time I was trying to save up for a mission trip and paying a camp fee, but when it came to the application fees I was like, “God I don’t have the money to pay for the fees,” and he said to use the money I had for the mission trip! Gasp! I barely had enough for my plane ticket for the mission trip, but you know God, He ALWAYS provides.
Now I’m part of an AWESOME team, who I can’t wait to meet and I’m EXCITED for another year spent with Jesus. A year that I know will be filled with growth and intimacy with God.
So I ask you, what’s your mountain? Are you afraid to get uncomfortable? I would like to encourage you to get off of your mountain and let God lead you. If we remain in our comfort zone, we will walk for years, like the Israelites, when we could’ve been there in days. Let’s reach our Promise Land in 11 days, instead of 40 years. There will be trials, but how beautiful it will be when we have reached our Promise Land!
P.S. Thank you to all who continue to share my posts, who are praying for me and my teammates, and who have donated!
