“Are you sure
this is attached right?”
“If I don’t
live I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your life.”
“If you push me
off I promise I’ll punch you in the face when I get back up here.”
“Can we pray? I
think I need to pray right now.”
“Can I just
hold your hand for a minute.”
These were my last
comments I made before jumping off a bridge over the Zambezi river, between the
borders of Zambia and Zimbabwe.
Unfortunately those
weren’t my only comments of the day. I talked nonstop for a good hour. Nerves…
They’ll get Ya!
Let me back up
though and explain why the heck I decided to zip line, swing jump, and bungee
jump today.
This world race so
far has been all about finding out who I am.
Learning how heaven
sees me, how God sees me, and that’s all.
When we become
Christians we DIE to our old selves.
We DIE to our old
ways of thinking.
We DIE to our old
ways of acting.
And God makes us
into a NEW CREATION
He doesn’t even
remember the old you because that you is gone. You’re a completely different
person.
Well….I didn’t quite
understand what that meant until the race started.
I believed God saved
me and I was in need of saving.
I believed God was
with me and was leading me and had plans for me.
But I never thought
that even my ways of thinking after becoming a Christian were to change.
I lived in fear.
I lived in doubt.
I lived in
insecurities.
I let what others
thought about me control my every decision.
I never thought
myself to be worthy of anything or anyone important.
Since the race,
month 2 specifically, I have been asking God to show me how he sees me. To help
me believe that’s how he sees me. And to give me confidence to live that out.
I’m not ashamed or
doubtful or fearful to say that I’m fun, encouraging, persistent, wise, a good
friend, a leader, funny, and beautiful. And I’m living this out now, too.
I’m finally
understanding what it means to be a new creation, to walk away from the old me
and into the life God has for me.
Fast forward to
today.
Annie and Katie were
planning on doing all the things at Victoria Falls.
I was planning on
watching.
I just got done
saying “If I had the money I probably would do it. But there’s no way I have that much
right now.”
Then I
realized….crap….there is a chance I have the money in there.
I made the peer
pressured and rash decision that if I had the money in my account and my card
was accepted then I would do it.
I remember praying
before I paid; “God if you want me to do this as a representation of my
new identity, then let the card be accepted. If you don’t really think it’s
necessary that’s cool too God!”
Then the receipt
printed.
“Yeah, it’s
necessary. I wanna see this!”
The money was there. (Shout out to Ron Hooper for donating to this once in a lifetime experience!)
Shocked.
But I did all the
things.
I zip lined over the
Zambezi river. That’s actually how I crossed the border.
I swing jumped over
the river.
Then I bungee
jumped.
I couldn’t even
begin to write down all the ridiculous things I said.
Luckily for me, like
13 people were videoing me the whole time.
I do know that I
thought of that episode of full house when Becky and Jessie bungee jumped.
I yelled something
about chipping my tooth (don’t worry though, I didn’t)
When the man asked
me how I was doing after bungee jumping I replied “oh..I’m just…hanging in
there.” Then I laughed at my own joke. A little more than necessary.
And I remember
yelling “GOD! THE WORLD LOOKS CRAZY UPSIDE DOWN! YOU SHOULD TRY IT
SOMETIME!”
And I definitely
sang “Free Fallin'” before I jumped.
But the most
important thing I remember saying was
“Okay God, I’m
not afraid anymore. I’m embracing this new life.”
Today was crazy.
Sent from my iPad
