A heart of desperation
When you were a child, did you ever try to swim from one end of the pool to the other with the cover on? My parents always told me not to, but I did it anyway. I remember getting close to the other side and my lungs felt like they were going to explode out of my chest! I was desperate for air. Fortunately, I always made it. I remember feeling immense relief when I immerged from the water gasping and filling my lungs with air.
“This is the air I breath” by Michael W. Smith
“This is the air I breath…I’m desperate for you…I’m lost without you “
In the past few months, I’ve been feeling desperate, but this desperation is for God. I feel the closest to God when I’m worshiping Him and sometimes I literally feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest because I’m so desperate for Him. I ask myself, “Am I desperately seeking Him?” “Am I so desperate that I can’t take another breath without Him?” Just like oxygen keeps us alive…is God our life source? Do we desire Him more than anything or anyone?
I know this year is going to eye opening, scary, wonderful, exhausting, and life changing. I also know my relationship with God is going to drastically change (in a good way) and I will have to rely on Him like never before. I get the amazing opportunity to live in poverty and see how the rest of the world lives. (We get an average of $3 for food and $5 to find a place to sleep a day) I think when you have nothing and you’re in desperate need of the basics (food, shelter, etc) then that’s when you’re really desperate for God to be your daily bread…
“Your holy presence living in me“
I’m so thankful that God’s holy presence is living in me. He is the only one that can truly satisfy my longing heart. I admit, I’ve looked to other things to fill the emptiness, but it is His salvation and my deep personal relationship with Him that satisfies.
