Here is a journal entry from one of my last nights in Costa Rica.
My heart broke tonight.
I saw a man asleep on the side of the road.
My heart broke.
I didn’t want to wake him, but as I approached, I could tell that he was not asleep. I asked him if he wanted my water and then I asked if he was hungry.
In broken English, he replied, “yes.”
I went to offer him half of my burrito. I knew the instant the words left my mouth, Jesus would give him all of it.
So that’s what I did.
The man’s name is Antony.
As Caroline and I walked away, we prayed for him together. Then we walked in silence. I asked the Lord what do people under the age of 18 in sex trafficking, teen suicide and depression, homeless people, and people who need to be loved have in common and have to do with me.
I sat down to verbally process with my squad leader, Seth. He mentioned my ability to grow every day. And I want to bring people into that, give it away to them, and give them my obedience to the Lord also.
Seth said that maybe God is calling me to the defense to the defenseless, which sounds right, and after I felt the Lord say the help to the helpless.
The hope to the hopeless.
That all of the preparation God has been stirring in me is for a divine purpose and the desires for more of Him, refinement, and the growth have been the beginning of all of that, which sounds right.
It makes sense.
He’s been showing me road signs. Even though this is hard and scary, it will be worth it.
Lord, will You help Antony to know You tonight. Help him to see Your provision in what I gave him tonight. Help him to know You’re the Father to the fatherless, that You’re all he needs, and that You don’t see him as less.
Help him to know that You love him, You see him, and that You want Him.
Thank You for Antony. Help him to know You and draw him to You.
It’s in Your name I pray, Jesus,
Amen.
