During my time at the hospital, I had a lot of help and support from my host and my teammates and my squad leaders. But, due to hospital rules, there were many times I had to be alone.
All alone in Tirana, Albania.
I was alone when I fainted on the bathroom floor.
I was alone in the pre-operative room as doctors went over the risks of my surgery.
I was alone walking into the operating room.
I was alone laying on the operating table before I was hit with anesthesia.
I was alone a few times, post operative, as doctors that didn’t speak my language swarmed around me.
But thankfully, I didn’t actually have to be alone because I have a relationship with Jesus.
Because not only was He with me, He also gave me unexplainable peace and protection and strength and courage.
I know this sounds cliché, but this is real stuff y’all.
There is almost no explanation for my lack of fear, because when I look back, it absolutely terrifies me.
Even my teammates said, “Yeah, Hillary we didn’t know why you weren’t freaking out, because we were freaking out and we weren’t even the ones getting surgery.”
And that’s because the Lord gives us what we need when we need it. He not only knows our circumstances, but He knows our hearts too, and He knew what I needed in the moment.
In the Bible it says, “the spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” Romans 8:26
How cool is that? I don’t even have to say a single word or mumble because we are helped during our weaknesses.
And so, I am easily concluding that I don’t want a life where I don’t have a relationship with Jesus. Because in life, don’t we all want all the help we can get? Especially when we are unconscious in a foreign country? I know I do.
