It’s been five full days since I’ve been at my home base in Richmond, Virginia. Five full days apart from my friends who became like family and five full days reunited with my family who have become like friends. It’s strange to think that just last week at this time I was on a plane headed toward an unknown future filled with excitement, grief, joy, pain, abounding love, and the promise of God’s faithfulness. I am now living in the midst of that future here at home.
The Race was an experience that I often don’t have words to describe. The past few days I have been avoiding my computer because I knew I needed to write a closing remark for my blog entries. Nothing has ever felt so strange and eerie in my life compared to writing this entry in front of my warm fireplace with the strong scent of pine from the Christmas tree to my left. I don’t know where to begin.
I think I can break it down into 5 key lessons I learned throughout the year. Here goes!
COMMUNITY
First, I will begin by saying that I have never experienced community quite like I did on the World Race. Living beside people 24/7, never leaving the house along, knowing the last time everyone showered or went to the bathroom because you live in such tight quarters, etc. I experienced the realest, rawest form of community. One where a person cannot hide from their problems or faults. One where love coats every conversation and soothes even the deepest offenses like a balm smeared on an open wound. One where celebration is a daily occurrence – even if just over a $0.50 cup of coffee. I learned much about myself from my brother and sisters’ iron sharpening my iron.
At one point, my eyes were opened to the way I lived in community back home. I wanted to cry because I felt I had failed big time. Before the Race, I wasn’t fond of other people’s messes; I was introverted as all get out, and the comfort of my own house often over-ruled comforting those around me. I was selfish. I didn’t get community and community didn’t get much of me. One day on the Race, I woke up to the truth that I could give so much more. I thought to myself, “If I am not giving my community at home 100% of me and I am choosing not to receive 100% of them, not only am I missing out but so are they!”
Now, this is not me thinking too highly of myself. I know full well (and have seen) that my community back home can operate just fine without me. But they are lacking what only I can bring, and I am lacking what only they can give me when I choose to live on the outskirts. My selfishness to retract myself from fully diving into my community causes a stunt not only in my growth, but also in the growth of others (1 Corinthians 12, anyone?). The Race creates a community-centered culture where you can’t really do much without the support and love of those around you. I am excited to give my 100% here at home. It’s not easy, and it’s pretty exhausting at times. But the growth and the love and the richness of life from saying “yes” is worth every ounce of energy and effort.
CHOICE
Something I learned on the Race was the weight of every choice I make during the duration of my days. I remember reading one day in Deuteronomy 30, verse 19, that the Lord has set before us both life and death, blessing and curse, “therefore, choose life.” It struck me that the God who can whisper a single word to light up the skies would give me, a weak and fragile human being, the responsibility to choose between life and death, blessing and curse in every moment of every day.
I learned that, in everything, the choice comes down to two things: my flesh and the Holy Spirit. Choosing my flesh is choosing death and curse; choosing the Spirit is life and blessing. It’s as simple as that on paper, but more complicated when you factor in emotions and the strength of the flesh we live in. It seems to get a little easier every time you choose to move by the Spirit and deny your flesh. Our flesh quiets down after a while of being neglected and ignored.
Choosing between life and death in the small things makes an impact in the grand scheme of things. Something as simple as choosing to cheerfully clean up after someone else’s mess, or taking the trash out, or choosing to make that phone call to reach out even though it will be awkward, or choosing not to put up defenses or a fight when someone comes against you. It adds up and becomes a habit to choose life or to choose death. The small things in our every day do matter. Are you choosing life or death in the miniscule and monstrous parts of life?
SIMPLICITY
In Swaziland, month 4, I began to hear the Lord calling me into a lifestyle of simplicity. I had no idea what it meant nor did I know what I was getting myself into. I thought to myself, “I live a pretty simple life. I guess the Lord just wants me to become a minimalist!” After a couple months of following in the foot steps of one of my teammates and trying to send my pack home (WR attempt at minimalism), God spoke loud and clear, “I didn’t ask you to send everything you have home, Heather.” I sat there in shock and awe. I had made a mistake and was running after my own ideas of simplicity. When I finally stopped trying and just listened to the words of the Lord, he spoke this phrase to me, “Love God. Love People. Follow Jesus.”
Everything else will flow from this simple life mission statement. I exist to love God first, and then love people, and in result I will be following Jesus. Simplicity is more than living a materialistic minimalist lifestyle. It goes into every sector of our lives: relationships, work, our spirituality, the way we spend money, food, how much margin we leave in our lives, etc. It’s been a fun ride learning what it looks like to live a Biblically simple life. I’ve read a few books this year on the topic and suggest the following if you feel called to leading a more simple life: Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne, Simple Spirituality by Christopher L. Heuertz, Freedom of Simplicity by Richard J. Foster, and The Rewards of Fasting by Mike Bickle (learning to live a fasted lifestyle plays into living a simple sifestyle).
GENEROSITY
It wasn’t until I went on the Race and lived in real community that I learned something about myself I was dreadfully ashamed of: I was not a generous person in the least. I say “was” not because I’ve got the hang of generosity now, but because I am in the midst of learning the art of generosity. I think that the first generation of the Christian Church did a really great job at outlining for us what generosity is supposed to look like.
I love the way that the Acts Church lived in community. The Acts Church lived in community in a way that bread generosity. They ate together every day. They shared everything they owned. They made sure no one was without food, clothing and shelter. No one had to busy himself with looking after his own interests, but instead every man was covered because every man was looking out for everyone but himself (Philippians 2:4). What an incredible, freeing, simple way to live life!
At one point in the Race, my dear friend Sarah caught me sharing something and said, “Isn’t it so much easier to share with people?! Life is so much less burdensome!” I believe there is so much truth in that statement. When we share what we have with those who don’t have, we share more than the need at hand – we share our life.
LIVING BEYOND CAPACITY
I wrote a blog about this topic back in August when I was in Malaysia (http://heathertobey.theworldrace.org/?filename=the-limiting-capacity). I’m just going to drop a chunk of it on this post, and if it intrigues you go ahead and check out the rest of it.
“Here’s the thing, I don’t want to live in my human capacity anymore. I want to live beyond myself. One of my favorite verses is 1 John 4:4: He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. Jesus is huge. I am not. Jesus is love and grace and compassion. I am none of those things without him. So, if I want to live beyond my human capacity, I need to live out more compassion and love and grace. I love what Erwin McManus said, “I don’t want to come to the end of my life and discover that there was greater capacity in me but there was never greater compassion. So many of us want God to be generous with us, but we don’t want to be generous with God.”
I feel like I need to write “SELAH” and leave you chewing on that for a few moments before moving on….
Living a life beyond the limiting capacity means that we give more to God to become completely empty and broken and overcome by His love, and then in turn he gives us more compassion and love to leak and seep into others. We give, God takes, and then God gives it back ten fold only for us to give it all away again. McManus says “there has always been more in us than we can bring to life. We have to give Jesus everything in order to live beyond capacity!” That’s the way the Kingdom works.
Maybe you are asking God to trust you with more. But maybe He is saying in return, “My son, give ME more.” How much are you allowing yourself to be broken by our loving Father? Do you want to see Jesus work greater things in you and move you to life beyond your limiting capacity? Give into the breaking and give Him everything. Let his ocean of love be poured through your being over and over and over again. Live out of brokenness and the unconditional love of Papa, and watch people flock to you because they taste and see that the Lord is good.”
______________________________________________________
These are, of course, simply highlights of the lessons I learned this year on the Race. There is so much more that I could write about, but I’ll leave you with these five lessons that transformed the way I live and breath and move and have my being.
And so, the World Race has come to a close for me. This is my final entry for this blog. I will more than likely move over to another blog sight so that I can keep you all updated on the “what’s next” and beyond. When I get that set up, I will post the link on this blog.
Thanks for your prayers and support and love that you have sent all year long. I couldn’t have had this experience without all of you rooting for me and cheering me on. You’ve played a large role in the work of the Kingdom this year as you have generously given of your time in prayer, money and love. THANK YOU and MERRY CHRISTMAS!
