“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
{Matthew 11:28}
This month was hard, but I couldn’t figure out why.
I was so tired.
Physiclally, emotionally and spiritually I didn’t feel like I could make it another month.
I was plagued with thoughts of wanting to go home.
I missed the comforts of my home.
I missed my family and my friends.
I missed the joy that I thought I was losing.
I missed being comfortable with who I was.
But thats not why I came onto the race in the first place.
I didn’t want to feel comfortable, so why was I feeling like this?
I found myself praying over and over again, G*d I just want rest.. how do I find rest?
Find rest in me child.
Find rest in my word.
My squad was having worship the other night and it finally hit me…
My whole life I have always been a people pleaser, saying yes to just about everything if I knew that it would make someone else happy.
I have lived this life trying to impress people with what I can do or say.
On a rooftop in Malaysia I finally broke.
I realized that I was bringing that into the race.
I was trying to impress my squad mates, my teammates, and even people back home.
I realized I have been playing that game with G*d too.
I was trying to impress Him with what I was doing out here.
How silly is that?
I don’t need to impress G*d with my actions or my words, all I have to do is simply say yes and be willing to let Him work!
Saying yes to what God is doing should be the easiest thing to do… why was I making it so hard?
On that rooftop I continued to pray.
Find rest in me child.
Find rest in my word.
I might not have it all figured out, but I trust in a G*d who does.
I don’t need to impress G*d, I simply just need to rest in Him and the joy that He has for me!
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
{John 16:33}
love,
Hanna
