You Might Be in Guatemala If…
1. All the men are pretty much shorter than you.
2. Everyone speaks in Spanish at all times, so you better start brushing up on your high school Spanish classes.
3. You are in an extremely hilly city where you walk everywhere.
4. The weather is absolutely PERFECT all the time!
5. Your host has the sweetest heart for the Lord and just gets how to live out his life for the Kingdom.
6. You get paired with another team, and it’s SO MUCH FUN.
7. There is a “fireworks show” at 10 PM, 2 AM, and 4 AM, almost every night.
8. Chocolate covered bananas are life.
9. Your only source of light is Christmas lights and two flashlights.
10. You need to go to the bathroom, which is a cinder block with a hole in it.
11. You order a Nutella drink, and it is served in an actual jar of Nutella.
12. Your best friends are the police and they give you rides around town when you are carrying heavy things.
13. You get to play basketball all month against the police and random teachers.
14. Your host mom is feisty and loves playing pranks.
15. Your host mom cooks the most amazing food in the world, so good I find myself licking teammate’s plates.
16. There is a giant market two times a week which seems to make your money disappear.
17. The kids at school are SOOOOO much fun, and I’m in love with all of them!
18. You get locked out of the classroom, so a kid climbs through the window like he does it all the time to let everyone back in the class.
19. One day they need to work on the electricity, so there is no power in the entire city.
20. You pray for rain so you can brush your teeth, shower, and flush the toilet.
21. Sometimes it doesn’t rain for a few days so no one showers for a few days.
22. Guacamole parties with your host and the police is normal.
23. The kids’ favorite songs have to do with moose, potato chips, and penguins.
24. Banana grams and Settlers of Catan have become normal afternoon activities.
25. Your teams completely take over the coffee shop or Internet cafe wherever they might end up.
26. The little neighbor girl has a pet duck, puts it on a leash, and sometimes throws it in your hammock.
27. You visit a church where dancing is not allowed…if you know me at all, you know this was/is difficult.
28. You meet a family from the community who completely breaks your heart and you find a way to help them no matter what it takes.
29. This is a place you know you will be back…Chichicastenango.
30. You play basketball every few days and realize you are 25, not 18.
31. You accidentally miss the hammock and hit your head on a cement block (also, you find out who your best friend is because she’s trying not to laugh while everyone else is concerned).
32. Your parents join you for a week of ministry and God shows up big all week.
33. You hike a volcano, or in my case the volcano hikes me (AKA I ate it running down the side eating a bag of Doritos).
34. You meet up with family friends, and they serve you the best food in the entire world.
35. You take a short stop in El Salvador on the way to your next place where you learn how to surf and just get to be with your people.
