So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.
James 4: 7-10
“Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy.”
Often, we constantly feel the need to put our guard up around others. We put a mask on and pretend that our heart is always filled with peace, laughters, and joy. Most say that if we become vulnerable, we are the weak ones.
When did being vulnerable become the bad thing? When did we have to start putting our guards up? When did we have to put on a mask to hide the emotions?
Have you ever thought being vulnerable could define you as the strongest ones, not the weakest ones?
I have been experiencing some sadness, grief, and gloominess the past few weeks since being in China. At first, I didn’t like it. I was quite upset. I didn’t come to China to experience these emotions.
But I started to realize something.
The sadness I was feeling was God’s sadness. The grief I was feeling was God’s grief. The gloominess I was experiencing was God’s gloominess. God has feelings too, he mourns for us. Does that make Him the weak one? No, that makes Him the strongest one.
I started seeing the light of vulnerability. I started to see myself as the strongest one. I started to draw myself closer to the Lord because I was experiencing the emotions that He was experiencing. I put my guard down and took off my mask so I could humble myself before the Lord. Because of that, he opened more doors of joy, laughter, and peace for me to experience.
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor.”
Now, I am not saying you have to always be sad or be in deep grief. It is good to have peace in your heart, it is good to laugh, it is good to feel the joy. But remind yourself that it is okay to be vulnerable. It is okay to be sad. Why? Because once you feel those emotions, you can go to the Lord. You can be humble towards Him and He will lift you up in honor. He will bring you more light. He will walk along with you.
Take a moment and bring your guard down, take off your mask. Feel God’s presence, feel His emotions. Let Him take you to where He wants you to be. Let him guide you. Allow him to lift you up in honor. Let Him open more doors of joy, laughter, and peace for you to experience. Let yourself grow.
Let Him take you on HIS journey. I promise you, it will be worth it.
As for me being in China this month and doing His work, I feel at home. I have been working as a teacher at the preschool at a foster home care. I can’t say much about where I am staying at exactly. But what I can say is that I love every moment here. I love the people, I love the culture. I love serving for the Lord. I know I am at the right place. I know this is what He wants me to do. This is the journey He has for me.
I am free.
