In Cambodia I fell in love, and I fell hard. It was like nothing that I’d ever experienced before, and it happened twice in the form of 2 beautiful girls from different villages. As we were riding in the tuk tuk to the first village, I had no idea what would happen in the next few hours. I had no idea that my heart would feel love that deep for someone that I just met.
Many people have asked me if the language barrier that I encounter every month is difficult and how that’s overcome. Usually the people that we are ministering to speak enough English to communicate or there is a translator. In the villages that we went to in Cambodia however we had 1 translator for 7 of us and over 30 kids, so much of what was communicated was nonverbal. It was at times like these where you had to fully rely on the Spirit, and pray and trust that who God is and how He loves was portrayed through our actions, songs, dances, games, Bible stories, etc.
As I’m writing this, I wish so badly that I could tell you these girls’ names and tell you their stories. Or if nothing else, I wish I could better portray the few hours that I was able to spend with them because I felt God’s love through them in a way that I never have before. And it’s something that I will never forget, so bear with me!
This cute girl was the first child that I noticed when our tuk tuk pulled up to the village. She was in her school uniform of a white button down and a black pleated skirt. I gravitated to her. She was beautiful and quiet and shy. All through the next hour we would make eye contact, smile and crack up laughing. I tried to teach her a hand clapping game which didn’t go how I had planned but was so much fun nonetheless. She left where everyone was at one point and I kind of panicked. I didn’t know how much longer we would be there and I couldn’t bear to leave without saying goodbye. She appeared a couple of minutes later; she had gone home to change into a cute little nautical red, white and blue dress.
At this village in the middle of Cambodia I fell in love when it didn’t make sense. We were only supposed to come to this village once, so I wouldn’t be seeing her after those 3 short hours. We didn’t speak even speak the same language to each other.
But I love her. I love her with a love that I can only attribute to the Father, because its depth doesn’t make sense. How fast it happened doesn’t make sense. Nothing about it is like anything I’ve ever felt for a child, especially one that’s a stranger. But it’s so filling and it gives the smallest yet most magnificent glimpse of the Father’s love, where as soon as I experienced it I wanted more!
And the Father gave me more with this little girl who stole my heart!
Just as the girl before, the second that I saw her something between us was different. She was even shier; the first 30 minutes were spent trying to gain her trust. I did this by purposely always being around her, whether that was while playing musical chairs (where I of course let her have my chair every time) or offering my lap for her to sit in during the Bible story. Slowly but surely she was coming around.
By the time we started playing Freeze Dance (where you had to dance while the music was playing and freeze as soon as it stopped), we were inseparable. We danced together for a solid 20 minutes, she even let me pick her up and dance around the room like that, and I could have stayed in that moment forever. I love this girl so much as well. Again it’s a love that doesn’t make sense. But as we were leaving she was running away down the path, I was watching her go and saying a prayer for her when she stopped out of the blue turned around and waved at me and then took off again. In that moment I melted. I realized that I loved her without any expectation for her to reciprocate that, so when she made that acknowledgement my heart was so full it felt as though it could burst.
Leaving those children was really difficult: it still hurts when I think about it. I wish so much that I could go back and see them again! But through every experience in the villages and at the children’s home the Lord taught me things about His love.
- His love is not conditional. It is not based on things that we do. He doesn’t love us more when we are good and less when we are bad. His love is also not dependent upon us loving him back.
- His love is complete. It doesn’t have to take some love from something else to love fully. I didn’t have to take any of the love that I felt away from the first girl to love the second one. By drawing on the Father’s love, I could have complete love for them both.
- His love doesn’t end. His love is outside of time therefore it never ends.
- His love for us doesn’t make sense! We as sinners don’t deserve his love, yet he still loves us.
- His love for us is beautiful! And when we get to experience his love, we are forever changed.
1 John 4:9-11
“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.”
And this and so much more were all revealed to me in the most unlikely of ways, by two little girls in Cambodia that don’t speak any English and don’t even know my name…but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
