I need to preface this post with a warning. This post might offend you. It might upset you on my behalf. It might infuriate you. You might hate the fact that this post is even on the internet. For the sake of the lessons God is teaching me, and the lessons He could potentially teach you as well, I ask you to refrain from commenting with harsh words of disagreement, or defensive words of your displeasure. I ask that you simply take a few moments of reflection to consider the way key words such as humility and submission might apply to your own life.
(photo credit: Melanie Wells)
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Humility.
Our friends over at Merriam-Webster defines it as follows:
the quality or state of not thinking you are better than other people : the quality or state of being humble (not proud)
When questioned, most would probably affirm that they consider themselves humble. I mean let’s be real, even if it’s true, who is actually going to proclaim when asked that they view themselves as proud or arrogant? (Excluding sociopaths, of course) It’s not a popular notion to think that others might perceive you as haughty. And we’re so petrified to even admit out loud or even to ourselves that we might struggle with humility. We are so trapped by the fear of man and his perception of us that we can’t humble ourselves to admit that we aren’t humble. (yeah, chew on that one for a second)
And per usual in my race and in my walk with Jesus in general, God has used specific tangible experiences to show me in the physical the things He wants to do in me in the spiritual. You know, that’s kind of how He rolls…likes to make sure those lessons stick.
The Lord allowed a situation to unfold on our team where He asked me to lay down what I thought was the “right choice for me” for the sake of the needs and desires of the team, and the wishes of leadership. God showed me a real-life, in-my-face, actual way to “consider others as more important than myself.” And in the moment, I chose my team. I chose the needs of others. But did that mean my heart was all there? Absolutely not.
In the moment my heart said, “What? This isn’t fair. What about me? What about what I want?”
How’s that for humility? #ouch
During our week in Rah Village, Kampong Chhnang Province, the Lord got ahold of my heart in challenging, fresh ways. Through the humbling decision of who would come to the village, He showed me even more that week about what it means to not just submit to the needs and desires of others, but to submit to Him and His will for my life.
He had trusted me to submit in the little things all year long…submitting to leadership and their decisions, submitting to ministry schedules that aren’t my favorite, submitting to ministry assignments that might not be especially conducive to my skills, submitting to the team and their decisions even when I disagree…the list could go on. And He has been calling me into a season of greater submission, deeper submission.
The kind of submission that means truly laying down my life for others. Laying down my need to be right, my need to be in control…and learning that those aren’t actually needs, they’re desires.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” -Philippians 2:3
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” -James 4:10
We are called to humility because let’s face it…that is the only appropriate response to the God of the Universe. He literally spoke creation into existence, with just a word. He breathes actual, real, tangible life into our lungs. He orchestrates His good and perfect plan for all of creation with absolute perfection and precision, even amidst the sin, junk, and mess that the enemy tries to thwart it with. He is big, we are small. He is good, we are not. He reconciled our inadequacies and our suffering to Himself through His absolutely perfect Son.
The only appropriate response is humility. What a picture of worship that is.
I’ve received hard, but needed feedback. I’ve been encouraged by my teammates, squadmates, squad leaders, and community from home. I’ve been humbled, yet pushed to the feet of Jesus. The World Race is full of proud, sinful people. It’s full of people who think they have it all figured out, and think they have all kinds of rights. But in all honesty, the Lord uses the stretching circumstances, living in raw, authentic community, and the struggles of living abroad to break those things in each of us.
And what a better solution to broken people than the grace and mercy of the cross?
