I was walking along the beach…purposely careful at first…in the sand where it was dry. And a voice said…WHY are you doing that? I didn’t have a legit answer other than I was wearing a skirt…I figured eventually I’d get closer to the waves. Watched as people walked and ran by…some couples and some individuals…folks in winter coats and some in speedos. Who on earth invented speedos by the way…I just don’t understand them?
Moving over to the wet sand…out of the waves… I hiked my skirt and leggings still not really preparing to get wet …but “just in case”…which seems to be the story of my life…calculated chances…or haphazard whims. Watching the waves crash is just thrilling I don’t care how old you are…it just is…the heartbeat of the ocean as though its alive. I looked ahead and determined that if I managed to walk straight that my feet would get lapped up by the waves…just barely…so I decided to go for it. Again it was still careful, simple, non-threatening. I could almost see His head shake…like what are you doing? GO FOR IT! These waves are made for this…you were made for this. He was reminding me of things in my life that I had baulked at…lack of confidence, doubt, or fear seem to be the theme…doing everything I can to avoid responsibility or leadership on the race… to what… “heal” from past leadership experiences…or HIDE from who I really am???
In thinking about the waves…I thought how refreshing it must be to Him to not have waves asking which way to go and when…they just do what they were designed and meant to do. Waves have a pretty sweet deal just crashing all the time…and then I thought…well why can’t I too? Be that is…with Him (not necessarily crash). Why on earth am I making this soooo stinkin’ difficult?
As I was thinking this all this wave just hit me up to my knees…soaking my hiked up leggings and the bottom of my skirt. …and I laughed…and laughed…out loud at myself…this isn’t so bad after all…a relationship is all He wants…just all of me.
