So I left home on July 4th and flew to Atlanta, GA where I was reunited with all of my squad mates. It was so good to see all of them! I was so excited and so happy! I honestly felt like I knew these people my whole life, and I just felt so loved, and it made the transition from leaving home a whole lot easier. But it still wasn't real life to me. I felt like I was just coming to Atlanta to visit 50 friends…it still didn't hit me that I was leaving the States for the next 11 months.
We stayed in the hotel in Atlanta for about 4 days. What did we do those 4 days? AIM prepared us for what we were about to experience for the next 11 months. We heard testimonies, heard what world race alumni learned on their race. We were given safety tips, and more of the logistics.
One of the days at Launch we went out to pray over the streets of Atlanta. My team and I had the opportunity to talk with quite a few people. Just normal conversation. Genuinely wanting to know people's story. All it takes is one, "Hello Sir, How are you doing today? Can I help you with anything?" or just walking up to a kid who is playing by himself and joining in his game and being his friend. Love. That's what we did that day. We loved on the people in Atlanta. Just showing God's love and man did it bring smiles to people's faces, and they showed the love right back to us.
And still….It wasn't hitting me that I was about to leave the country for 11 months to do this very same thing. The World Race was something I was talking about for months, something I was preparing for…and I was so scared and so nervous about going, and now that it has arrived, I was pretending like it wasn't real. That launch was like the second round of training camp…only this time I was in a nice air-conditioned hotel room instead of a tent.
But then "safety man" came to talk to us at Launch. He just gave us different scenarios and stories of what did/or could happen on the race. And I felt fear start to creep up inside of me. As a team we had to figure out the steps we would take in these different scenarios, and I became absolutely silent. I couldn't think. My mind was blank, because all I could think about was, wait…..if that actually happens I don't know what I would do! If this actually happened I wouldn't be able to sit in a cushioned chair and chat with my teammates of what we should do! And the thought of that scared me. So much that I was speechless. It started to hit me that this was now real life, and I started to question if I could do this.
But not too long after that, I recognized that fear. I knew that fear, I've dealt with that fear at training camp, and I wasn't about to have it grab a hold of me again, filling my head with lies and tearing me down. And I sat and just listened to God, and I journaled what He had said to me: (Didn't even know I wrote all of this until just now as I am writing)
"Do you believe what your saying/singing?
Do you trust me?
Will you follow me?
Do you believe that I will provide for you?
Do you know that I am BIGGER and STRONGER than any fear, any burden that you have?
Do you know that I love you?
Do you know that I am here with you right now?
When you think I am far, I am closest to you!
Be willing to change. It's going to be scary, it's going to be uncomfortable at first, but I did not call you to be comfortable. I called you to have Faith in me and allow me to show you where I am, what I am doing, and what I have planned.
Everything I have created is good!
Do not put limitations on me, do not put me in a box, you are not in control, I AM.
I AM the great I AM, I have created heaven and earth and I will always BE.
Stop doubting me!
I sent my son to die for YOU!
Lay your burden, your fear at the foot of the cross, and leave it there!
Come to ME!
I want what is best for you, I am for you not against you!
You have so much more potential than you think, Let me show you!
Open your heart, be vulnerable with the people I have placed in your life, l
et them in, they will help you they will guide you. I have put them in your life for a reason. Don't be afraid. It's okay to fail sometimes….that's how you grow that's how you learn. No one is perfect but me! Walk with me!
Let me show you who you are.
I have created you differently from everyone else, I know how you function, how you work and you have the ability to reach people in ways no one else can. Plug into me, so I can show you, teach you!"
All I could say back was, "yes." After that, I didn't question if I would be able to go or not. I knew I could do this because God is with me and He called me to do this. And now that I am in Thailand on month 1 of my race…I am so glad that I did leave, that I did follow, and that I did trust God because already He is showing me how BIG He is and how BIG His love is!
More Blogs about Thailand coming soon!
