Well, this is the month of the race I’ve been waiting for. My prayer for the past three months has been for a broken heart. And as it begins to crack, I’m concerned I asked for a burden I can’t carry.
In my first two months on the race, I experienced SO much. I used a machete to chop down a cornfield, grown relationships with people who only speak Spanish, lived with boys who were raised in gangs and addicted to paint-thinner, and on and on. But this third month, I’ve truly experienced heartbreak for the people around me.
For our month in Nicaragua, we are working with a ministry called Vision Nicaragua that supports a community named Patel. In this community, the main source of work is at a sugarcane field nearby which exports large amounts of sugar to other countries, especially America. In order to keep costs low and “protect” the plants, the owner uses a very harmful pesticide. This same pesticide was made illegal in the United States after many Hawaiians developed terminal, chronic kidney disease from being in constant contact. At this time, the pesticide became illegal for use in the states, but it is still manufactured and sold to countries that continue to use the pesticide without regard for the terminal illness it causes the workers.
In the cities surrounding the sugarcane factory, it is estimated that 4-5 men die everyday. These men work in these fields day after day, for long hours knowing that they will eventually die from it because they have no other way to put food on the tables for their families. They are left with two choices: watch their families starve to death or work in the fields until they become ill and THEN watch their families starve. It’s painful to watch, and this month I’ve been in a constant state of frustration and helplessness.
While here, I have been blessed to work with the doctor on staff at Vision Nicaragua and my friend, Bethany, who is a nurse back in the states. We’ve been able to have conversations with people directly affected. We’ve provided care for the widows and their children. And we’ve gone into the cities making house calls to the men who are waiting at home for the inevitable. A few days ago, the doctor took Bethany and me to the house (by house I mean a metal shack with tarps separating rooms) to visit a 23 year-old man who is believed to only have days left.
For a healthy person, creatinine levels are normally between .5 and 1. When the doctor checked this young man’s creatinine levels, they were above 25. It was explained to me that creatinine is naturally produced in our bodies, and it is cleared out by the kidneys. But when the kidneys begin to shut down from pesticide exposure, they can no longer clear out the creatinine and the body is basically poisoning itself.
In the United States this young man would be in the ICU, but instead he lays on this cot and his grandmother fans him with a towel. In the United States, he would have access to dialysis and could possibly extend his life for years! Why was I born in America? Why was I blessed with a family who can afford healthcare and college? Why me?
This is a huge epidemic that isn’t being addressed. And the worst part is that America is manufacturing the poison, selling it to 3rd world nations, and then buying the sugar back. It’s a very selfish cycle, and with a little compassion and MUCH less greed, this problem could be easily solved.
This month, so far, I am learning to have faith that God has a plan!! I believe that He works in very mysterious ways, and His power surpasses ours in every way possible. BUT I am also learning that God calls us to LOVE His people. I am here to “love” by playing, laughing, and hugging these children. But I am also called to do so much more than that! When I think of what love truly means, I think of my parents. My parents would give up ANYTHING for my sisters and me! When we were little and forgot jackets, they would freeze and give theirs to us. When we ordered something at a restaurant and didn’t like it, they would trade plates with us. When we were so frustrated with our homework, they would sit for hours explaining it to us even when they had work to do. These are all silly examples, but my parents have preferred me for my entire life. And we are called to love and prefer God’s people 10,000 times more than this!
When I look at real-life situations like this, everything else begins to blur and their importance seems invalid.
Lord, I pray to be Your hands and feet in a tangible way. I pray for a compassionate heart ALWAYS. I pray that my heart will always break for the things that break Yours. I pray that your comfort will flood the hearts of those who need it, and that I will know how to love and take care of them for You. I pray that my selfish spirit disappears. Thank you for the beauty You have blessed us with in the midst of pain.
