I realized about a week ago that I hadn't written a blog yet about something big that happened a little over two weeks ago. And it's because I was frustrated. I was angry, but still at peace, because I knew that there was a reason. I knew that the Lord had something good prepared for me…for this change.
So I'll start off with a thank you.
Thank you to my old team, TEAM KINA, for building me up. For being like family to me. For honoring me and having fun with me. For fighting for me. For encouraging me in who I am in Christ. For bringing me through heartbreak of letting go. I remember times when we asked each other questions and made each other think. I remember times when we had laughing fits. I remember the bond we created and we still maintain today. It won't be the same without you guys. It just won't. I love you all so much, so fiercely, and will do my best to continue to fight for you in prayer.
But back when we were in between leaving Nicaragua and heading to Romania, we had our travel days. And before we traveled from Costa Rica to NYC, we had a doozy of a change…
Team changes. It's the time that everybody gets anxious and weird and there's a lot of chaos.
I remember when I was handed my card with the list of my new team, I cried for so long, thinking why!? and why does our team have to change? I saw familiar faces on the card – teammates from Kina (EJ and Lauren) – and it gave me comfort, but I was still upset. I had peace, but I was upset and have had trouble for the past 2 weeks walking into the newness of a new and uncomfortable team.
I have been frustrated.
I have missed my old team.
I have struggled being okay with such a change.
I have just had a hard time.
And on top of all this, I have had to deal with a new continent, a new language (which is a pretty language), a new ministry contact (they are awesome), a new leader (which is a teammate from Team Kina, EJ!) and new squad leaders being raised up. In other words, mind chaos.
Through it all, it has been a process. But things have been sorted out. Frustrations have been sorted out and realness has happened. And I am finally at a place of rest about everything. Yes, I still miss my old team because I just developed so much love for them and they became family.
But I walk in newness now.
I am okay.
I am no longer frustrated.
And I am excited to see what the Lord is going to do through my new team and the things I am going to learn from them and the things they are going to learn from me.
Everybody, meet team Spirit Reign!
I am so excited to do life with this team next month as we go solo in MOLDOVA!
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