This is a blog from a teamate of mine, Kelly Jarvis. It is about the spiritual warfare we have been facing as a team and is so true. It’s long, but good.
Our last night in Uganda we stayed with the other teams living in Mbarara, as they live on an orphanage compound near to where the bus coming to take us to the Rwandan border was stopping. It is a beautiful establishment, with hundreds of orphans receiving food, care and an education. There is definitely a level of spiritual darkness at play though as well. Many of the orphans have come from places where dark spiritual forces have attached themselves to them and it creates an intense battlefield. The teams stationed at this ministry have had people consistently sick the entire time they have been there. They have seen spiritual manifestations within people and have seen the power Jesus has in casting these demons out.
The night we were able to spend with these teams was truly great. It was so refreshing to catch up and relive the stories from the month. It was also one of the most beautiful starry nights; it seemed endless.
Some of the girls from our team were able to squeeze in a room already occupied by some of the girls from the other team, but the remaining four of us pitched two tents in a dirt room with straw on the ground located on the compound. I really loved it, as it felt as though we were back in the ancient times, setting up our room in the stable. It was fun laughing with the girls and reminiscing about the time that has already passed. In our preoccupation of the new environment though, we made the mistake of not taking time to pray over our room. One thing we have learned from personal experiences in Kenya, as well as from people who have gone on past races, is that praying over your room once you get somewhere new is one of the first things you absolutely have to do. But we didn’t.
Another thing I have learned in my time on the race is that between 3am and 4am is when the most amount of spiritual warfare occurs. The veil between the spiritual worlds is at its thinnest and it is also when other people start practicing darker spiritual practices. The word night mare actually refers to this idea, as a mare is an evil spirit and night is attached because that’s usually when they visit.
Around 2:45am I awoke, having to use the bathroom (surprise, surprise). After using it, I came back to the room and tried to fall asleep, but had a hard time. My mind kept racing and I was having a hard time finding peace. About 20 minutes later, Rachel (my team leader) spoke, asking if Peggy (my team member and tent mate) was awake. Peggy has a lot of discernment and wisdom in many things, but particularly when it comes to spiritual warfare. Because of this she has been appointed “watchman” over our team, which carries the weight of being a protector over us. She is absolutely the best person to have been given this title and she has taught me a lot through her growing in her gifting. When Rachel asked if she was awake, she said she was and then Emily Rae and I also responded saying that we were also not asleep. Rachel told us that she had had a disturbing dream. In it our team was sitting together and all of a sudden we started gossiping and defiling one another. Our squad leaders were sitting nearby and they gave Rachel a questioning look, but she didn’t know what to do. Lucas, one of our squad leaders, said something about finding the way home. Rachel and Ruth looked up and noticed a group of crosses in the sky. Just as they noticed them though, Rachel all of a sudden felt intense fear. She looked up and a witch was flying towards the group screaming curses against the Lord. Rachel covered her head and crouched down and kept repeating to herself “Christ is King, Christ is King, Christ is King”. Then she woke up.
After Rachel finished telling us her dream, Peggy prayed over us and over the place. Then we all prayed together, some of us in tongues and some of us through singing. I still felt fear, but I felt instantly calmed and protected as we were worshipping. We all went back to sleep, but I remained awake for quite a while. I put on my music and as I was praying and listening to Chris Tomlin’s “All My Fountains”, my fear was strongly cast aside through a vision I received. I saw the same scene that Rachel had described. But in it, I was dancing; worshipping my King. And the sky instantly filled with light. It was blinding. It was the Glory of the Lord. He was casting everything not in His light out. As I saw this, I just started smiling. I knew I had absolutely nothing to fear.
It is such an interesting thing to me though, that the only fear I have experienced on the race thus far, has been in moments of spiritual warfare. I think a concern for anyone going on the race is physical safety. Maybe this is more so for the parents, but I know it was definitely something that crossed my mind as I was applying and preparing for the race. But I have never once felt physically unsafe, even though there may have been environments that I could have. The few times I have felt fear have been in moments where spiritual forces have been at play. And in those moments my fear has been chilling; unlike any fear I have felt before. Spiritual warfare is real. It is easy to disregard within the United States because we are doing a good enough job keeping God under wraps and in a box. Satan doesn’t need to do much work. When we say spiritual warfare doesn’t exist or are ignorant to it, we are aiding in the side of the enemy. C. S. Lewis is quoted as saying “We are not physical beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a physical experience”. Amen. Here in Africa people know God exists. Even if they don’t practice Christianity, they don’t disregard the power of spiritual forces. They live in the reality of the quote above. They understand that at our core we are spiritual beings.
But a huge lesson that the Lord has been teaching me through all of this is that I have nothing to fear. Yes, spiritual warfare is real and it absolutely needs to be taken seriously. It definitely does. But through Jesus, I have already won. I have the power of Jesus in me and nothing can overtake that. Satan wants me to fear. He revels in it. I have noticed that the nights when my team and I have experienced strong attack, other factors that heighten my fear always seem to occur, such as hearing the floors creaking outside of our room, doors opening and just feeling an overall sense of darkness. I truly believe that this is all part of the attack, fighting to keep me in the fear that I initially feel. But this fear is not the way Jesus desires for me to live.
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. ” 1 John 4:18
“Get yourself ready! Stand up and say to them whatever I command you. Do not be terrified by them, or I will terrify you before them. Today I have made you a fortified city, an iron pillar and a bronze wall to stand against the whole land��”against the kings of Judah, its officials, its priests and the people of the land. They will fight against you but will not overcome you, for I am with you and will rescue you,” declares the LORD. Jeremiah 1:17-19
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
Surely he will save you
from the fowler’s snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.
A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.
If you say, “The LORD is my refuge,”
and you make the Most High your dwelling,
no harm will overtake you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
“Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.” Psalm 91
It has been a process learning this and I know it is an everyday battle choosing to walk in the freedom that Jesus has given me. It has been so comforting how in the past couple of circumstances where attack occurred, my fear has dissipated quicker and with more confidence. I know that in the Spirit I can stand boldly and declare that I am a child of the most High God and that nothing can touch me. It is such a freeing truth that I sometimes have a hard time walking in, but luckily the Lord is gracious and will continue to guide me in it.
I’m sorry, I know this is intense. I know that a lot of what I am writing may make people uncomfortable. I’m sorry, but I’m also not sorry. I want to challenge you as this has been challenging me. I want to be truthful with what the Lord has been teaching me and call out the reality of what I have been seeing and experiencing. You all know my heart. You know I wouldn’t say this stuff unless it was something that I believed was crucial to our walk with the Lord. So please pray about what I have written. Pray about the way it may challenge or convict you. Pray that the Lord would reveal His truth to you.
Thanks for reading.”
