I’m Emily Werness and life in Montenegro has taught me about patience, grace, and what home really means.
My team has been welcomed into the home, not merely a house, but the home of Joel and Nicola this month. Joel is originally from Chicago and Nicola from the UK. They have two adult children, Janelle and John. Janelle actually spent the first part of the month with us and it was such a blessing! They are missionaries who have been on the field for over 30 years – sometimes plowing, sometimes watering, sometimes sowing or reaping. Some years were struggles and full of burden for the people they were trying to reach with the Gospel. Others were full of joy and celebration seeing so many come to know Christ and helping to teach them more about who Jesus is. I am learning so much from them. They have moved around quite a bit in the past 30 years, not settling down and being able to stay in the same house they raised their children in, or laying claim to a place as their own, but always following the Lord’s call to the next place, the next country, the next group of people who need them. I feel I have seen in action through them what it means to have everything while possessing nothing. They leave their hands and hearts open to God and the Spirit’s leading. In doing so they may not have the typical life we all dream up when we are young – having our own house, a solid job, and building a life for ourselves. This is not a bad dream at all! I have dreamed a life like that for myself many times. The life they have built has been on the rock of Christ and for their story it has meant almost living like nomads, not really settling in anywhere for more than 10 years because the call of God draws them elsewhere. It changes the definition of home and what it truly means to feel at home.
7 months ago, if someone were to bring up the word home, my mind would jump immediately to the familiar streets and parks of Rosemount, Minnesota, my room, and Caribou Coffee even! And of course, my friends and family also flooded my mind. The images have shifted as this race has gone on. And it has hit me in this month especially that home is not a house or a place where memories have gathered. Home is not America. Home is not Rosemount, Minnesota. Home is not my little room in the basement. Home is made of relationships – a foundation that all begins with Christ. He is the base of all my relationships in this life because it all flows from him. My friends, family, the new brothers and sisters I have met around the world – he is the rock. Through fellowship with people can I grow in even closer relationship with God. We learn and grow together – closer to the Father.
When Christ is your foundation, when the power of the Holy Spirit lives in you, when you accept the grace freely flowing from the cross and empty tomb of Jesus, home is transformed. You feel it deep in your spirit, which is what I have been feeling this month. Home is no longer a place to be pinpointed on a map. It is no longer something to find and then attain. Home is within you. Home is within me. This is what I have realized. Home for me has become faces. It is the faces of my crazy family, my best friends, my Pastor, my youth group kids, and my church! And it keeps growing. It is like this mosaic masterpiece that Christ is painting on my heart and in my mind. The more people I meet the more it grows. The more brothers and sisters I pray with, worship with, laugh with around the world, the more it grows. Each face, every encounter, every prayer, every conversation, and every laugh adds to the picture that lives within me – the face of Christ. God has set eternity in my heart – in each of our hearts – and that is why we still end up searching for more and going after what we think we can attain in this life – the seen. We are striving in vain to bandage a hole with the natural that can only be filled with the Supernatural – with the love and grace of God.
Walking alongside my Jesus, in fellowship with him, is where home becomes reality. I feel at home in his arms. I feel at home in this community with L squad, with Joel, Nicola, and Janelle. It is because we are experiencing fellowship with family – brothers and sisters going after a life in the light and helping each other get there, all learning and growing in so many different ways. Home is where His Spirit is – in me, in each of my squad mates, in Joel, in Nicola, in Janelle, in Bruce, in Mom, in Jacque…that is where love and grace is fostered. In seeing more of Christ and the beauty he meant for us all to enjoy and thrive in…I have gotten glimpses of eternity, of heaven in these relationships and communities. This is a place I want to stay and plant my roots in: in this version of home. That is why home has been each of these countries so far and why home will never again be the same for me.
I have seen what home really is. And that is where I want to be. The beauty of it is that I will never have to leave it or sell it. It doesn’t have a geographical location or border or property line. He is always with me – that’s the amazing thing – he DWELLS within me, within us. He is home with us.
I’m Emily Werness and my citizenship is in heaven – glory!!
My prayer:
Take off the bandage expose what I am to the air
I know it’s painful but darkness I no longer fear
It’s the salt on the wound that brings healing right after the pain
Oh it’s time for a change again
(Time for a Change Again – Strahan)
PS – ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT FUNDING: I have raised all I need to for the World Race through AIM, but I am still raising money for a plane ticket back to Minnesota and for something called Project Searchlight – click the link below to find out more information about what that is and how you can help! Love you all!
