Competence is important to me. Incompetence may even be one of my biggest pet-peeves. This year focuses a lot about becoming who we were made to be in Christ. It is about finding our identity, learning our strengths, and becoming mature adults. I find myself surrounded by many 21-23 year olds who are starting to learn this trait as they live away from home for the first time, or are continuing to learn it. Competence is a huge lesson learned in college or directly after college. So, why is competence this important to me?
Growing up, I put a lot of responsibility on myself. In my family and with my friends, I often took on responsibilities I thought those around me couldn’t handle. It became a burden for me. If those around me are not capable, I have extra work or extra pressure to fill in gaps that I see. This is not something I want to live with. I shouldn’t feel pressured to fill in gaps, and I shouldn’t judge people for not learning this trait “fast enough” in my mind. God has slowly been showing me better ways to handle people’s incompetence.
Some examples of incompetence that I’ve noticed this year: my teammates ask for help in an area I think they should be able to accomplish themselves, my teammates are lazy and someone has to pick up the slack, or my teammates desire change and expect someone else to do it for them. I never realized how important competence was until this year. I got frustrated a lot in the middle of my Race because I just wanted people to act like adults. I used the line many times, “You’re an adult and although I do differently, I’m going to let you do it yourself.” I watched myself detach from people’s growth and back away out of annoyance instead of love people where they are at. We are called to support one another in our growth and love each other through it. Yes, competence is important and will always be something I desire to see in those around me, but I cannot judge people for not learning it while they were younger. Competence is a skill that I’m lucky my parents taught me at a young age. I’m not making excuses for people’s incompetence but I’ve learned that I can give then GRACE while they figure it out.
