Hello my awesome people-
Looking back I cannot pinpoint specific times I heard from The Lord. I had this belief that he only spoke to super spiritual people or anytime he had something to tell me he would tell me through someone else. The thought that he would speak to ME was impossible. Who am I that he would take time out of his busy day to give me direction in my not so meaningful life.
DANG, I didn't know who I was.
Now I do. I am walking out what I was actually told quite some time ago, I just didn't believe in my worth. I didn't think he could possibly have the best for me.
"Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted to you." -Mark 11:24
Screw you Satan because you've been caught in your lie! He does love me. He does want and HAS what is best for me. Regardless of my screwed up past, he does want to use me to bring HIM glory! SAY WHAT!?? How could such a holy, righteous and powerful God use little old broken me? Because I am a new creation. Because I am his freakin DAUGHTER. Because he had and has a plan for my life. Because he loves me like crazy!
These simple truths have been hitting me upside the head and my spirit is going buck! I now get the race is the BEST he has for me right now and now I see how truly amazing this journey is. I realize that he has even BETTER to come. To think Christianity truly is simple. It is 2 steps. Realizing his love for us which then drastically changes us so all we want to do is bring Him glory in our lives.
This is what I want, to glorify God with my life. I want every moment to be given to him.
I have some really cool things to share with you all. The Lord has confirmed multiple things regarding my future over the past couple months.
1. I am called to inner city ministry (not surprised).
2. I am called to be a teacher in the school system (knew this since I was a child).
3. I will not be in the classroom right away when I return home but will be doing things that will equip me to one day teach.
I have no time table. I can't tell you dates, when or where. The beautiful thing is I don't have to, I'm not the planner, he is! He will guide my every step, I must simply obey. The stress and fear is gone. I might not know anything but the next step but I have great peace because he has the ENTIRE thing planned out.
I am deserving of an awesome life with my Lord. It will be difficult. I will be placed in situations where I have to simply rely on him even when the situation looks hopeless. I will meet many people with deep hurt and pain in their life. I will be called to love people who have been labeled unworthy and insignificant their entire lives, people whose walls seem unbreakable. I will meet people who doubt my ability to handle a certain situation.
The crazy thing is, this excites me! I don't want to lead an easy life and I don't want to serve where I see little change. I never want to be in a situation where I rely on my own strength. I cannot believe I'm saying this but since I know whose I am and that my creator holds the power to the universe, bring on this crappy world!
"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." -John 16:33
I am living a life of faith. Relying on my God that I cannot see in physical form but witness in everything I see and in every person I meet. I live by spirit and not flesh.
I used to want to know the plan but I've decided to simply enjoy what's in front of me, surrendering the future to The Lord.
"And he said to all, if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it." -Luke 9:23
All I know is that I have people who love me, who have willingly given me a place to stay and have lots and lots of love to pour on me when I return home. To me, there couldn't be a better place to start :).
Love.
ellie
