Finally here @ Month 6

Hello my people-

Traveling the world, what an epic life! Seeing it all, 11 countries in 11 months. 

It's month 7. We are officially the "oldest" squad out on the race. This means that out of ALL the world race squads traveling the world, we've been out here the longest.

So we've become the experts so to speak. We basically got this "thing down." 

It's true. We are expert movers, able to make any place a home. We can live off of nothing but rice, beans and chicken for weeks if we must. We are always stared at and I now understand, in a very minor form, what celebrities go through (trust me, its overrated). We know how to communicate using hand gestures since verbal communication is usually not an option (basically we will kill anybody at a game of Charades). We can travel for three days straight,  showering in some form and changing into a fresh pair of clothes aka avoiding the hot mess look. We can hold it for hours until we find a legitimate toilet. I could go on forever, like I said, were pros. 

I have a confession, I wasn't always a pro. In fact I had a terrible attitude for most of the race. I couldn't stand the community and was convinced the people around me were completely unrelatable. I didn't dig the weird Christian "stuff" like speaking in tongues and healing, convinced it was people putting on a front. I wanted my bed, health food and gym. I rarely saw the joy in situations and counted down the hours till ministry would be concluded and I could simply retreat to be by myself. For those of you who know me, your probably pretty shocked. For those of you who don't know me, this is NOTHING like me. 

Last month my life got ROCKED. I spent a month sitting back from ministry and God called me out.

I wasn't embracing this community because I was wishing they were my friends back home. You can't love anybody properly if you are spending more time comparing them to people you know than you do getting to know them. He hit me with the truth, the problem wasn't them, it was ME!

After that night I had new eyes for my teammates. I embraced them for who they were and I gave them a chance, putting judgments and all criticism aside. What can I say, I freakin love them! They make me laugh, smile and challenge me everyday. To think I wasted so much time trying to fit them into who I thought they should be.

Life lesson: Embrace people for who they are! My God clearly spoke to me that night saying "I have these people in your life for a reason and you need to start loving them right and TRUST they are exactly what you need." 

This is my life, traveling and never truly having a home. Sleeping on a sleeping pad night after night. Being sweaty for most of my day. Loving non stop even when I'm exhausted. Eating rice over and over and over again while smiling like its the best food I've ever tasted. Handing people your hearts than having them ripped out every month when you have to leave. This is the life he chose for me therefore I'm done asking why and instead thanking him for it. 

I don't doubt anymore, I believe in trippy things like healing, prophecy and speaking in tongues. I've become that crazy Christian person I fought against most of the race. I will never be the same. I have done things that challenged me physically, emotionally and spiritually to a point whether I swore I couldn't make it. In those moments God taught me it wasn't by my strength but by his.

I get it. I now know what the bible was talking about, I can't go back. I long to be more and more like my God (2 Corinthians 3:17-18). I long to desire what he desires, caring less for things of this world. I won't fit in when I go home but I no longer fight this. No, I invite radical change into my life because the closer I grow to him, the more I see this world has nothing to offer.

It is never a matter of what you have or where you are but your willingness to embrace it. To treat your life like it's a gift right out of heaven. To treat yourself like you are worthy of living an awesome life. Praise God because an "awesome" life no longer refers to making money or "living it up" by getting drunk and convincing the best looking guy in the bar I'm the one for him. No, I'm talking about a life full of joy and fulfillment that lasts longer than a night and won't leave you wondering if there is more (Romans 8:6-7/12:1-2). Nope, I've got it my friends and I can truly say I'm enjoying this life, now that it's no longer about me."

I'm stoked for what God has for me. It took me till month 6 to stop fighting God and what he has for me, thinking there is no way he has the best for me. Guess what!? I know he has EVERYTHING for me because I finally want to give him EVERYTHING no matter how "weird" I will become. 

Know I am not perfect nor NEVER will claim to be. I will NEVER have it "together" and I cannot FIX anybody.  But I do know I'm loved and I know who I follow. For me, that's enough.  

Amen for where he's taken me, where I'm at and where I'm about to go.
Love your lady,
Ellie

Praising the Lord till I pass out? Man, I want to experience this.