Every person is in process.
Where we are at in this process of sanctification and life is not a physical location or according to our own efforts. It solely depends on the Lord. What he has brought us through and what he is inviting us into. As I previously stated God showed up at training camp in Power, in Prayer, and in Party (joy, celebration, love) and he is continuing to show me just what that means.
Coming into training camp I was struggling, the biggest thing I was struggling with was fear. This led to lack of trust and surrender in my relationships, specifically with God. I did not believe that God wanted to speak to me. I said that I knew he would but I did not believe it. In my recent conversations and interactions with Him I had not been hearing anything, I was coming up empty handed and feeling alone. So instead of surrendering that to Him I decided to try harder, and when striving didn’t work I resolved to ignore Him.
As I write this I am reminded of a song I have learned a lot from in the past year.
There is no place I would rather be,
than here in your love, here in your love.
Set a fire down in my soul that I can’t contain
and I can’t control.
I want more of you God.
One night when we were singing this song I felt the Lord respond to me in a way that I hadn’t felt in quite some time. I felt his presence and his love envelope me and surround me. I felt a weight being lifted off my shoulders and my arms being able to rise in surrender and worship. I felt the hands of others on my shoulders praying for God to reveal himself to me, to pour his love out on me, to romance me. In that moment God was reminding me of my status and identity in him.
He was reminding me that I am a BELOVED daughter of the King.
In that moment I felt as if I could finally feel his love, his fire, and the gentle caress of my loving father. He kept telling me how He loved me, oh how he loves me.
The lies and fears that he did not want to speak to me and communicate with me started to dissipate. I felt the truth of his love and presence in a way that I have not experienced in quite some time. And I am so thankful.
But, I know that I am still in process. There is so much more he wants to teach me about my identity in him, about his love for me, about how he wants continue to break chains in my life, and how he sees me. I am excited and I challenge you to consider where you are at in process with the Lord.
His delight is to break the chains off our hearts. Where is your heart bound in chains? He wants to meet you there, he wants to show you his love and care for you. Will you let him?
