28 days. I only have 28 days until I hop on a plane to Chicago with my awesome squad mate Hayden. Only 28 days to say good-bye to my family and friends for the next 11 months. 28 days is nothing compared to the 160, when I started my count down back in March sometime. These past six months have been crazy awesome! I got accepted to the Race, became an aunt for the 3rd time to a precious little boy, for the past two months I was blessed to be on staff at camp, which by the way is my all time dream job, and many other exciting adventures.
Now that it's almost time to leave, I'm starting to drag my heals and question if this is where God really wants me to be. I know without a doubt that this is where He wants me. I wouldn't have made it past my second deadline to get to launch or my first deadline, if the World Race wasn't the next chapter in my life.
Let me be honest with you. I'm straight up terrified of what is to come this next year. Going on this trip is the BIGGEST step of faith I have ever taken in my life. There is nothing about the race that calls me to go on it. I don't camp, outside is not where I belong. I belong inside in the AC with a book to read or movie to watch. I don't like this kind of adventure. I hate the fear of the unknown. I love my life and where it's at. I'm all about the comforts of life. And being ripped away from my comfort zone scares me the most. I won't be able to wear my everyday clothers ( Nike shorts and t-shirts) for most of the trip. I don't own anything other than norts or basketball shorts so the thought of my wearing a skirt a few times a week or everyday really freaks me out! I really does, I'm not going to lie I'm crying right now just thinking about this. Now my BIGGEST comfort is my alone time. When I come home from school or work the first thing I do, besides getting something to eat of course, is go to my room and just chill out by myself watch a movie or listen to some music. I'm a totally introvert. Now this may come as a suprise to my squad mates, but it's true. Especially if I'm not surrounded by my best friends and my family. So going into training camp one of my biggest fears was that I wasn't going to make any friends and that everyone would hate the new girl. Which wasn't true! PTL! I'm so glad this side of me didn't show at training camp! I'm hoping to break through my shell this next year. Cause being the loud, crazy one for a change was pretty great!
Like I said earlier, I've never been so scared in my life. My BIGGEST fear is that I won't make it through these next 11 months. That's almost a year being away from my family and friends. I'm missing first birthday's and Christmas's, football season, and many more important events I'll be missing. Who wants to miss any of this?! Not me! But I know I will make it. God is so much GREATER than anything I will face this next year. Right now, I'm holding onto Him as tight as possible, He will see through these next 28 days as I say good-bye to those around me and as I transition in this next season of my life. He will walk beside me every step of the way and will cath me when I fall. Just like my eartly father does.
I wrote this in my Bible the other day and sometimes I need to take my own advice!
"Diana! Don't worry! God's got it all taken care of! Trust Him!"
All I need to do is trust Him!
