(Bar in Chiang Mai Thailand. Photo credit due to Lighthouse in Action)
Tomorrow I am going to Thailand.
Tomorrow I am jumping on a plane, and heading off to a different country, and yet I still have no idea where I am going to sleep or how I am going to eat when I get there.
I say that not because I have some sleeping disorder or because hate the taste of thai food, I say that because I have no idea how I am going to pay for my food or my rent once I get there.
Months and months ago I heard the Lord once again tell me to ’Go’. He put women stuck in human trafficking on my heart years ago, and finally he told me to go to the nations and love those in the Thailand red light districts.
And so I immediately said yes, and began preparing for my trip. I had no doubt that the Lord was going to provide for me so I hardly worried at all about fundraising. The Lord’s got this.
As the day for me to buy my ticket approached I began to feel a little worried. The ticket was about two thousand dollars and I only had seven hundred in my support account. You don’t get the ticket unless you have the money, obviously. Days passed and despite writing blogs, posting on Facebook, and praying consistently, I watched my support account remain at seven hundred dollars.
The next thing I knew it was a week before I was supposed to leave, I still didn’t have my ticket and my account hadn’t moved in about a month. That was when I received an email saying that Adventures in Missions had just purchased my ticket for me. I Guess they didn’t check my account balance beforehand. Or more likely I guess that God really wanted me to go, and thus they didn’t check my account balance beforehand.
As this last week in America has progressed, I have continued to pray, and check my support account. And guess what? It still only has seven hundred bucks in it. That is not even enough for half of my ticket to Thailand.
And yet I already have the ticket, and I have the continual encouragement of the Lord whispering ‘Go’.
So tomorrow I am going to Thailand. I am going already owing aim over one thousand dollars for my ticket, and with no money in my account to pay for food or housing. Believing, hoping, and trusting in the one who has called me.
I am writing this blog not as a plea for money, but instead as encouragement for faith.
If my support doesn’t come in, then I guess I will just go on a four month fast, great way to grow closer to the Lord right?
If my support doesn’t come in I will live with the children in the slums, finally understanding what true poverty is.
If my support doesn’t come in then I know that there is a reason, and that God is going to teach me so much through it.
But I am still going, because the Lord told me to, and even thought I have no idea how he will make it work out, I am choosing to trust Him.
I am not worried. I know that God has a plan. Sometimes God waits until you are completely desperate and out of options before sweeping in and provides for you in amazing ways. Working miracles only He can. I’ve seen it a million times in tons of different countries. And I know I will see it again.
In my desperation for funding He is stretching my faith, my trust, and my ability to follow when he says ‘Go’ even if it looks like I am going down a dead end path.
I think that Hillsong United nails my situation right on the head in the song Oceans when it says:
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior
The lord is taking me to the boarders of my faith, and pushing me off. He is taking me somewhere that I would never go on my own so that he can grow my faith.
I don’t believe that I will end up on a four month fast, or living on the streets with the kids. I believe that the Lord will provide for me in amazing ways that I can’t even imagine. I have faith that the Lord hasn’t called me to something, and then He is just going to leave my high and dry.
And so I leave tomorrow in eager anticipation to see what the Lord is going to do in my impossible situation. I am leaving with expectancy to see Him sweep in in amazing ways, providing through family, friends, or just strangers in the airport.
On that note, if you feel called at all to give to me and my mission to help women and children trapped in human trafficking, then please do! You are the way that God will provide for my every need. You can donate by clicking here. Every little bit helps!
What do you need to say yes to today that the Lord has called you to, but you have been hesitating because you can only see a dead end?
