Teacher!!
A child screeches in the middle of class. TEACHER!!! With an emphasis on the high notes. I turn and respond, “yes”? Sometimes I feel like I am that child screaming out to our teacher, Jesus.
I started reading a book called “Sacred Rhythms”. Below are a few excerpts from chapter one as the author discusses a betrayal:
“While I had the normal feelings of anger and outrage, sadness and grief, there was an even deeper longing- the longing to be healed… Distrust and suspicion had made me hard-edged and withdrawn, and I had found myself crying out to God to do something within me that I could not do for myself.” (Barton. P.21 & 22)
This chapter was describing my life in a way I could not find words for. Aren’t books great? She goes on to explain more about James and John…
“If they had not been honest with Jesus about what was going on inside, their darker desires would have functioned underground and probably have eventually destroyed their relationships with the other disciples and their ministry.” (Barton. P. 26)
She was referring to selfish ambition, pride, lust, fear, self-protection, and others. Do any of these sound familiar? If so I encourage you to take them to the feet of Jesus. Cry out to Him from those broken places and allow Him to ask the question: “What do you want me to do for you?” like he does in Mark 10:46-52.
Barton says, “…it is even riskier to refuse to acknowledge what’s real within us, because whether we acknowledge them or not, these dynamics are at work wielding a subterranean power over us.”
And that’s where I’ve found myself. Month 9 and I am still trying to “figure out” how to fix the broken places within me and react differently to the hurts of others. It seems so simple but so very powerful to present your needs to Christ.
What are the things you need healing from?
What would you like Jesus to do for you? Let me know how you have made space for Him to work in your life. He is waiting for us to simply ask.
As an update: I have only $1,645 left to fundraise!! We are so close to the end!
Fun photo of how to keep your phone dry in the middle of rainy season. 🙂
Sunset at Amazing Grace Church where I teach in the evenings.
Breakfast the other day was coconut water and meat. Only 80 cents! I would do this daily if I could!
