I have a crazy feeling in my eyes. An overwhelming feeling of sadness in my spirit. My stomach is tossing and turning with uneasiness. I am feeling homesick before I have even left! Homesick for a country that is not even my own!!
I cant even express the full words that I am feeling at this moment in time.
It is our last day in Guatemala and I am not ready to leave!Â
In the background i can hear crying i got up to see if someone was hurt and found andrea a beautiful friend of mine that works with the ministry sobbing because we were leaving! 🙁 it broke my heart to see her so upset 🙁 i told her that this was just the beginning of our friendship!! Â
The world race is bitter sweet!!!!
Yes I am happy that I am going to the next country. Yes I am so blessed that God has given me the opportunity to go to not just one country but eleven! But I was not prepared for this heart break! Can I do this eleven times? I have heard people who have went on the word race say ” my heart was broken” lol I was not expecting it to be broken like this –  I never gave much thought that the connections we make , we will leave behind!Â
Today our dear friend binjamin came and said he got time off his work so that he could come and say goodbye to us. It spoke volumes to us! He sat with us,shared with us,prayed for us and loved on us! He is probably one of the most genuine guys I have ever met! We all cried and when he left there was a huge lump in my throat and a heavy tug in my heart! This was our first goodbye and we have many more to come – i realised I was so attached with this place and the people!  
I knew it wasn’t going to be easy but wow this is crazy hard!!
I don’t know if i will feel like this every month or if God has put Guatemala on my heart- maybe one day I have to come back and continue Gods work here! I don’t know the answers but I trust God with my future! Its hard to leave but i must press on and keep running this race!Â
I can safely say that Guatemala will have a piece of my Heart forever!!Â
